Living in the Dark
by HorseStar1
Summary: Order 66 has taken everything Ahsoka knew. All she has left is a little Youngling she saved, and a burning hope to survive. But living in this world Vader has created isn't easy - especially since she's restless and furious with Vader's actions.
1. Chapter 1

**Five Months after Order 66**

There was no moon on the hot Shilli night - the grasses remained still and the heavy humidity was a warning of the oncoming storm. Asleep in Ahsoka's arms, Cala snuffled as the older Togruta tried to find shelter - any shelter where they might not be seen by others. However, it was becoming quite evident they might be forced to stay with someone.

Their past few days had been terrible. The past few months...to put it mildly, they weren't any better. Everyday was a challenge, and at first, Ahsoka just felt...weak. Even after her ribs had mended, her heart had not. She truly missed Anakin Skywalker.

She missed the Jedi...maybe even Master Windu. Certainly he was better than this...maybe not, but still.

Ahsoka knelt to the ground, lifting damp mud, or perhaps it was clay, with her fingers and streaking her cheeks and forehead with it. Facial markings halfway concealed, Ahsoka wondered if she should rub Cala's out - it was unlikely that she would be remembered by Vader. Settling with some gentle streaks, Ahsoka smiled gently, so sadly, at the tiny Togrutan child.

The child who never had a chance to show her face to the galaxy, the one who was forced into hiding just because of Ahsoka. Ahsoka hated it, but she knew that if Cala would die, it would be her fault. It was only because whoever was on the former Padawan's side would receive the cruel punishment Vader issued to all.

Death.

Vader was not Anakin Skywalker...he just wasn't. Anakin was kinder than that - he understood her. This man, no _monster_, did not know who Ahsoka Tano was as a person, not anymore. Because he would try change her, and morph her into a criminal, even though the galaxy was now run by a criminal liar who had stolen Padme and Ahsoka's Master.

Who cared if it was wrong? Because Ahsoka hated Palpatine...despised him. In the end, the galaxy would know the truth. Vader would know the truth. Palpatine rejoiced only in the Chosen One's now limited powers, and one day, he would find someone new and better to replace him. For some reason, Ahsoka hoped it truly, deeply hurt Vader.

Standing and letting out a small groan at the weight of Cala in her arms, Ahsoka braced her back and bit her lip as her exhausted body protested. Her clothes hung limply on her scrawny, once fit and healthy, body. She really needed to eat more...

Cala moaned in Ahsoka arms, sweat beading on her crimson forehead. Ahsoka's hand scurried to her canteen instinctively, one arm supporting Cala against her body, and she fumbled to remove the cap. She allowed it to fall to the dust below and hurriedly wet the younger's lips. What had she done, forgetting to keep Cala hydrated?

It was impossibly hard to care for children, Ahsoka decided, as Cala's purple eyes blinked open. Half the time, she was doing things wrong. Well, what could be expected? She was still pretty much a child herself.

Cala pushed herself out of Ahsoka's arms indignantly, muttering that she wasn't a baby. Ahsoka offered an amused smile, resting a hand on her lekku, a small gesture of reassurance. The tiny child liked to believe she was holding up well, but it was obvious she shared the burden that Ahsoka carried, even if it was only a portion.

Ahsoka, still smirking, watched Cala rub the sleep from her eyes, and take in her surroundings. "I hear something." She announced, then hesitated and whispered, still straining to hear, "I feel something."

Ahsoka couldn't believe she had actually forgotten that this was the home of the dangerous Akul, the Akul that would destroy these two lonely Togrutan girls with ease. The Akul who destroyed without mercy. Bands hunted them - there were celebrations when the enemy was killed, but the Togruta generally only took what was needed for food. It was never a meaningless hunt.

The smile slid from Ahsoka's mouth, and suddenly one of her previously hidden (in her very dusty, mangled robe) was in her hand. She searched her robe quickly, pulling out an unfamiliar lightsaber hilt that Jenx had awarded Cala. The child had revealed it to her mentor about after a month upon coming to Shilli, only to have it snatched away in fear that it would lead to discovery.

Ahsoka looked at Jenx's 'saber, studying every line as if weighing her decision, then, finally handed it to Cala, "Don't you dare kill me. Or yourself." She said dryly, before adding in a more serious manner, "And don't let anyone see you. Then they'll know we were former Jedi."

Cala stared at the lightsaber with raised, slanted, but square eye-markings, "We're in the Outer Rim. Far away from Vader."

Ahsoka looked at her, long and hard, and for a moment, neither was sure of anything, because there was only a treacherous cliff they were navigating and it was a long way to the bottom of endless pain. Cala gulped as Ahsoka said, her voice soft and low and full of foreboding, "He's got spies everywhere, and they won't hesitate to kill you."

A distant scream of desperation, the sound of the animal stalking its prey jolted the Jedi girl back to reality. Her green blade glowed, snapping to life for the first time in a very long six months, and she backed up. "Don't strike unless I tell you to. Hide."

Cala's smile at the blue glow of the lightsaber was cheery, and Ahsoka knew the feeling quite well. She could still remember climbing into the caves of Ilum for the first time - before she knew Anakin - and afterwards looking at her created lightsaber and thinking, 'This is mine. This is real. Now it's life or death.' But upon her mentor's firm glare, the girl hesitated. The blue beam of light cascaded back into the gray hilt, and the scowl on her face was almost funny.

Ahsoka backed behind a rock, literally dragging Cala with her because the child was so insistently curious and demanded upon trying to see this quickly approaching curious. "What are you - " Ahsoka trailed off, her eyes locking on the beast she had not seen since she was almost four years younger than Cala. The words died in her throat, and she could only stare. At the very least, it kept her quiet.

The thing was huge, with saliva dripping through it's lips, and when it lifted it's head, a snarl menacingly evident on it's features, the sharp, knife-like teeth gleamed. In what? There was no moon, only the distant roll of thunder, but that did nothing to cower the beast.

Ahsoka whipped her head around, nervously searching for what was the light source, but then she saw that Cala had her lightsaber activated again to see the savage animal better. The child was crazy, absolutely crazy. Ahsoka reached out for the hilt and jerked on it, but Cala grasped with strong, muscular hands, "_Mine_."

The Akul hesitated, its tiny brain calculating and processing the small sound. The hunters? Was it time for its next meal? After all, the voice had sounding very young...

Cala wouldn't let go of her possession, only work at it harder to remove it from Ahsoka's hands. The older girl didn't let go, either, and rage blossomed on her cheeks. "You just gave us away, idiot!" The girl whispered furiously, jerking harder, "Give it _back_!"

Ahsoka was furious, too, and she scowled darkly, completely forgetting anything but what landed her in trouble with Skyguy the first time she happened to meet him. Did danger matter then? No..."Me? I'm not the idiot who activated that lightsaber!"

Cala smiled sweetly, but the determination in her gaze was doing little to persuade Ahsoka to calm down. Meanwhile, the Akul had spotted the two Togruta (who both happened to be idiots in such a situation) and was silently coming closer, "Yeah, well," Cala replied finally, her purple eyes on the Akul, as were Ahsoka's, "Too late to worry about that, now, if you had actually thought about where we happened to be!" And the blue beam shot back out.

Ahsoka took that moment to grab the lightsaber from her hands and fiercely say in a very loud voice, "That's the _last _time your getting this, or at least until you learn to listen!"

Cala grinned again as the Akul came within five feet of them, "As you did?"

For a moment, a glimmer of a smile crossed Ahsoka's face, breaking her concentration..._well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. _And the Akul sensed its chance, crouching low to the ground, and just as it leapt, Cala flew into hiding with fear written all over her young face. Ha. Ahsoka got her way.

The Akul landed heavily on its large feet, paws, whatever, Ahsoka thought as she nimbly rolled underneath him. Suddenly, the girl who had not been a Jedi for six months was back, and she was just where she left off; mouth, a scowl filled with determination. Nose; wrinkled in disgust and concentration at her enemy. Eyes; narrowed, firm, and with one message - stay back!

The Akul had fought before, and it appeared that he had won, considering the dark blood matting his body. Ahsoka could hear Cala gasp in revolusion, and the animal swung its massive head to the source of noise. He was closer to her; he started to turn around, eyeballing his prey hungrily. It was then, with a firm, authoritative tone of voice, Ahsoka said softly, "I'm bigger, Barve. Yummier. Once you get me, you will have no trouble wither her."

They danced around each other, completing a full circle. Ahsoka was nimble on her toes, and several times had the animal tried to fake - who knew they were so smart? - and Ahsoka had wasted energy readying for an attack.

The akul crept towards Ahsoka, looking confused at the implied tone of voice. It was controlling and strong and clearly stated that the predator was in control. One more step, and Ahsoka hissed, "Easy. Back away from the girl." One more step closer.

Cala looked more than infuriated, and daringly, she started to creep forwards. It was that movement that distracted Ahsoka, made the older girl's eyes widen in horror. Somehow, Skyguy could always keep himself and Ahsoka safe at the same time, but Ahsoka showed no talent in that yet. In her distraction, the Akul charged, sending Ahsoka flying.

The Togruta landed with an "Oof!", but immediately used the force the Akul had pushed through her to launch into a painful roll. As she crouched, blue eyes met the fiery golden, and in the corner of the blue eyes, Ahsoka noticed her lightsabers roll out of reach. One just disappeared in a river the girl had not noticed before, and as for the other, Ahsoka had no idea where it went.

Ahsoka leapt to her feet, in her shaking body she only knew resolve and the need to do this. On the outside, she seemed so calm, so ready to fight. A frown twitched on the corners of her lips as she glared at the animal, and it charged her again. This time, she was on its back as soon as it came close, her body a red and orange blur of agility and strength.

She landed on it's back in a rider's crouch, her feet leaving her almost standing, and for several minutes the Akul bucked and demanded to be ride of its passenger. The stubborn girl gripped its leathery back and held fast, and soon it became aware that its attempts were rather stupid to continue. So he threw himself onto his side, crushing Ahsoka beneath its massive body.

Her left leg was evidently bruised, but it had landed in the crevice between the leg and stomach area, resulting in none full impact. Ahsoka let a breath of relief, her mind already spinning for new tactics.

She was lucky, however, because beside her was a wooden staff with a sharpened rock tied to the end. Ahsoka could distinguish it as a weapon she had learned about in her younger years, but her disoriented mind refused to offer a name.

Still, her slim fingers wrapped around the end and she charged, ignoring the other advancing girl. Why didn't she listen? She was going to kill them both!

The wood met the Akul's hardened skull, and Ahsoka ground her teeth as she pressed the staff to it. The Akul, to put it mildly, did not look amused. Let's try, Ahsoka decided, furious? Enraged? Unhappy?

The descriptions her mind supplied fit the animal perfectly, and he quickly used these emotions to fuel more power through his stocky, muscle-bound legs. As he pressed into the staff, it split like a twig, and the Togruta was at loss for what to do. All she had left was her wits, and in her fatigue, they were nearly fried.

Darting backwards, searching the Force for her 'sabers, Ahsoka saw only one choice. The animal was too close to her, and she reacted by yelling loudly at Cala to strike it with her lightsaber.

If she obeyed, Ahsoka didn't exactly find out. It was too late - in so many ways, it was too late - and Ahsoka was so tired - she had failed, she was terrible. But because of a silly mistake trying to keep the younger alive. At least she had...was she?

The Akul's impact on her body sent her flying again, but when she attempted another roll, her body hit a rock. When she hit the ground, small, sharp stones scraped her face, and she could almost taste Cala's fear. But she also felt triumph...sweet victory.

* * *

><p>Cala was crying in fear and surprise at the same time. She stared at the downed creature, purple eyes so wide they might pop out of her little face, and she darted over to the older girl, "'Soka, 'Soka, wake up! Please! I did it!" She rolled the limp body over, staring in shock at the rivers of red blood running down the orange cheeks, and in further alarm, she listened intently.<p>

She was right; somebody was coming. Perhaps to the creek for a drink, or something...and when the Togruta woman with a hooded face stepped into view, both creatures froze. The poor child stared at the woman and her face crumpled. She burst into hysterical tears, because she didn't know what was going to happen to them, but...but...

The woman knelt beside Cala and Ahsoka, and the little girl caught sight of a military bag, worn and burnt, filled with meats and a few vegatables. Her slender fingers - they looked surprisingly like Ahsoka's - touched the girl's cheeks. At least, Cala thought optimistically, she could not see Ahsoka's facial markings.

"Come." The woman commanded, and she easily lifted Ahsoka close to her body.

When the woman turned her small body away from the younger Togruta, the child silently grabbed Ahsoka's lightsabers, and hide them with hers in the small cloak that was draped over her spindly shoulders.

Cala had to trot to keep up, but her tired legs were soon relieved. They came to a cottage, a dwelling in the middle of nowhere, not at all how Togruta were supposed to live in tribes. The confused child did not question the woman, and when the came in, she threw back her hood suspiciously. "Who are you?" The woman queried nonchalantly, and Cala shook her head, pointing to Ahsoka.

The woman smiled down at her softly, taking her through the house to another room and set her on a bed. Her nimble fingers flew over the girl, checking her for injuries, but she shook her head, a tired and swift motion, "She's just tired. She'll be alright. Her leg will be sore for a bit, but she didn't suffer any head trauma. Her back might hurt, and she'll need to be cleaned, but..." The woman shook her head. "Did you kill the Akul?" The woman's deft fingers lifted a cloth from a small jug of water, and Cala panicked.

"I'll do it." She volunteered meekly, holding her hand out for the damp cloth.

The woman looked confused, "Did you?"

"What?" Cala asked, now sounding just as confused.

The woman let out a small sigh and asked, "Kill the Akul?"

Cala felt a burst of pride, and she beamed whilst nodding. "Yes." She was so proud, so happy, she didn't notice the woman cleansing Ahsoka's face, and when she finished, Cala was brought back to reality with a gasp.

The woman suddenly looked very young as she looked at the cleaned Togruta's face, and her bright sapphire eyes glowed. "_Ahsoka?_"

**I finally finished this chapter.I haven't had a lot of time because school started about two weeks ago and its just been busy. So my updates won't be very regular. I'll try.  
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**Anyone know who the woman is? **


	2. Chapter 2

The woman - some knew her as Mai, others just referred her as to 'the crazed witch woman' simply because she closed herself up, living in a comfortable solace of life where no one could so much as see her - closed her eyes, a sparkling gem blinking out before quietly murmuring in soothing tones, "I am so sorry...I just...it can't be." She took in a breath, squaring her shoulders, and gazed down at the still dusty, scrawny child in front of her and wondered what had done this - it wasn't just the Akul, it was grief. It shone on the teen's face evenly also, like a single star picking her out in a crowd.

Just like the young woman Mai.

She had a child - a mischievous, beautiful girl who was uncannily smart and intuitive with powers that Mai had a very faint grasp of. The child had been healthy and wondrously happy despite her pained childhood, much to Mai's relief. Unfortunately, the girl was indeed a troublemaker with little sense of danger. Trouble could've been her middle name.

Grief for what _she _had done to her own little girl, her own baby child. She had raised a child whom she called Ahsoka - very much like this girl - after a warrior princess long told in the history of Shilli - she herself had particularly loved the tale - and looked forward to the day she could recite it to her own child Ahsoka, the tiny face shining joyfully as she listened to the story of her namesake.

But then things had changed for the mother and daughter, long before the infant was born. Aron was the name of Ahsoka's father, and once, he had loved Mai, but before he left to find work during a time in which they had been hunted. He had loved Ahsoka, even though he hadn't known her. Deep in her heart, Mai knew he would've cherished his little girl had his own two parents not been killed.

The savage man laid siege to all those around him. He despised Mai, for she did not completely love his parents that way he had. Soon in his demented mind, he came to blame Mai and when he met his daughter, the child had seen it. She was special...so special to Mai and the universe, and _now she was gone. _

When Mai had finally heard of her former husband's plight from another woman in her tribe, she had not cared. She didn't care for much of anything, other than quiet, and the tranquility of being alone, or with Tali. Tali only showed tender affection when Mai felt down, and she always knew the right words to calm her. But...

It was too late for Ahsoka, her warrior princess.

And it was her fault, for trusting Aron. He had returned when Ahsoka was little over a year. Mai showed him only love and trust, but Ahsoka had showed fear at the powerful man.

Aron had set their shabby home to flames, and thankfully her baby had somehow escaped, as she had. Aron and Mai had battled, leaving the tired woman weakened. After the fire, she had been so consumed by smoke and shock that her body wouldn't comply. She slept in unease whilst her child had been taken by the man she once loved, and sold into slavery.

Six months later, the brazen girl found her way into the hungry tribe's Akul fight, despite her evil slave owners trials to keep her in check - Zan still had slaves, still overworked and killed them. He only loved his money - but she had seen her mother almost die. Mai had no memory of the next events, for she had been severely injured, but she was told Zan had sold her to the pirates.

The only good outcome? Aron couldn't hurt ever again - he had died by Tali's hand. The very bad? Her baby girl was never found - she couldn't have survived their torture at only three years of age.

In her mind, Mai would count the years as they went by, and thinking that _this _year her child would be seventeen, so close to not a child at all anymore, and she would quietly close her eyes as she thought of Ahsoka's birthdays as they went by. It hurt her, it truly did, but somewhere within her body she found hope, but sometimes, she was so vulnerable she could hardly imagining facing the world, even though she had to every single day.

This girl didn't seem particualary vulnerable - nor did the other girl who was looking at her with a half-mad expression on the face, one tiny hand gripping the teen's tightly. Her lips were parted slightly, but the only sound she could muster was a croak. Mai quickly apologized, rationalizing in her own grief-stricken mind that it just wasn't possible. Her baby girl was long since dead.

Well, her flesh and blood baby girl. She had accepted the care of a tiny toddler a year ago when the infant was orphaned. But that didn't matter now - the child shared the care of one of her friends, a woman whom she had depended on since her own girl was a baby - Tali.

As the years rushed by, so swift and quick that Mai could only dream of pinning them done, she became the outwardly nervous, but with hidden reserves of unbeatable strength. In a soft voice, she quietly murmured, "It's just a name of a girl she reminds me of."And Mai leaned forward, just a bit, to see the skinny little teen better. She was right - definitely not _her _baby.

With that, her back straightened, and her blue eyes looked slightly glazed over. Methodically, she handed the girl the cloth and asked, her voice sounding winded as though she had been yelling for hours, "What's her name - and yours?"

The little Togruta wrinkled her nose as she thought, her purple eyes scrunched in concentration. For a moment, Mai thought the child would say, 'What's it to you?', but rather said pointedly, "My name Cala. She's Soma."

Mai felt crushing disappointment for some reason as she continued to stare at the girl - Soma - whose face Cala was rubbing. The little one watched her suspiciously out of the corners of her vibrant eyes. Mai's eyes only rested on the older teen's closed lids and she wondered briefly about the color veiled beneath them.

Each time a pang of hope sounded in her heart, and recognition, Mai would dismiss it with some excuse. Finally, she decided that she was only a crazy woman who knew nothing at all of her daughter anymore anyway, and that she was so stupid to even hope. When the tears threatened, she mumbled, "I'll be back." And she whirled around.

Outside the doorway, she pressed her hands to the mud wall, and choked back the tears. Some days she wouldn't even think of Ahsoka, but now, it just seemed so close. Slowly, the woman slid to the floor and buried her face in her hands. Seeing those similar facial markings mocked her - no! It wasn't true. It just wasn't. Why couldn't she accept the truth? What was wrong with her?

When she looked up, the little girl was leaning on the doorway, her eyes no longer hooded with suspicion. She looked uncertain and so young and innocent, but haunted by a terrible nightmare she could only hope to awaken from. Her little voice held a tremor as she whispered, "Can I have some water?"

It was then that Mai nodded, once, slowly and lifted her tired body so she could walk with her smooth gait to the small kitchenette where a jug of water awaited the poor, thin girl. Looking the child over, Mai wished she could know why this child looked so - so much like she held an aura of power, but still so suspicious.

* * *

><p>Cala Zhou, a small thing for her six and a half years, but very imposing (or so she liked to believe) was quieter than her mentor, but determined nonetheless. She had bright purple eyes, the richest and and most royal hue imaginable, and her skin was a mesh between red and orange. Her facial markings where quite square, other than a circle between the upper part of her eyes markings.<p>

She wore a richly dyed blue tunic that was cut off at the sleeves (she had to discard of her Jedi robes) and lightweight, dark leggings that made moving easy. Her light blue Togrutan sash hung carelessly off a belt, and on her face, she wore a scowl.

She was the former Jedi Youngling who had befriended Ahsoka in the midst of chaos, only to be led down the dark path, but miraculously survive (if only by the hand of Jenx, a friend and adviser of Ahsoka who lived in the depths of Lower Corusant after being exiled from the Order for forbidden love) the Dark Side's trials to dispose of Ahsoka. She hadn't seen the Jedi die, but she knew Ahsoka had seen some deaths that tore her apart.

She was suspicious of the woman - she had yet to learn her name - and she had no idea how she had known Ahsoka's name. She would have to talk to the older girl later.

Cala's eyes watched as the woman's slim, steady fingers poured the younger a drink, and handed it to her. "What's your name?" Cala asked, still sounding like she was trying to play the warrior's part in the matter. She held the water to her lips and gulped greedily, watching intently.

The woman suddenly looked very strong, but she sounded quiet as she finally muttered, "Mai." She didn't offer her last name, Cala noted, watching the woman get herself her own glass of water, "So," Mai continued, sounding casual - like she wanted to know something, "Where are you from?"

Cala stood up quickly, hiding her grated nerves beneath an aloof gaze, and said to her water, "Inner Rim. We - uh, we travel a lot." She drained the glass so she wouldn't have to speak anymore, and smiled as she gave it back to Mai. The two Togrutan girl's fingers brushed lightly, and Cala's eyes met Mai's. Mai's eyes were wide and a deep sky blue, the kind of weather that was warm and sunny...but then they clouded over, and Cala saw suffering.

Mai cleared her throat and said briskly, as though to change the subject, "We should check on her." And then her feet carried her to the small room, where Ahsoka's eyes were blinking. Cala sat on the cot with ancipitation, but Mai found herself leaving, saying she would bring the girl water. Once gone, Cala whispered, "'Soka, we ran into trouble."

The older girl moaned, "I knew that. Thanks a lot. If you had listened to me..."

Cala bristled, her Akul turning an interesting navy-colored shade, and she sharply retorted, "I did. I probably saved your life." She sniffed, "But do you thank me? Nooo. Instead you insult me. And besides, if you saw where we are, you'd know I didn't mean the Akul. And that's not even the _real _problem." Cala lowered her voice again, "She knows your name. I told her you were Soma, but she called you Ahsoka at first."

Ahsoka looked more alert, and a bit intrigued, not to mention worried, "Who?" It was then she looked around, taking in the homey room with it's mud walls and glowing lanterns. Probably machine-operated, but warming nonetheless.

Cala's eyes showed worry as she as she sat, wiggling slightly, "She said her name's Mai." She whispered.

Now, had children called their parents by their first names, Ahsoka would've reacted, but she simply frowned. "The name sounds familiar." She murmured quietly to herself. Cala could see her friend calculating.

But it was then, then, two worlds came colliding together, and this time, they met up quite nicely.

* * *

><p>Ahsoka was unsure of the name - the way it sounded quiet, but very special and delicate, like it was her way of life - Mai, Mai, Mai. She repeated it over and over, trying to connect it to any of her memories, even heading into the guarded territories of her earliest remembered moments, and there, the name dangled. A Togruta woman teasingly saying it...somewhere. Somehow? Maybe...<p>

Footsteps jolted the two out of their quiet reverie, and Ahsoka looked up, her eyes unguarded. In those unguarded eyes, there was innocence and uncertainty, and they met the sapphire-colored ones of another woman's, and Ahsoka knew. But this woman was dead. Gone. Ahsoka was skirting the impossible, her lips moving in fear that she was wrong, but then she sealed them shut. She could only squeak.

The woman looked to be in denial, her expression was indeed guarded. But she met the wide blue eyes of her daughter's, and somehow they both just knew. In an instant, everything, past and present, was gone. It was just them, together and now, and then Mai whispered, "It is you...isn't it?" She looked so hopeful, "Ahsoka?" The name hung in the air.

What could Ahsoka say? She couldn't lie, but she couldn't lead her mother to the life of danger she was leading, just as she had done to Cala. It was better that no one knew who she was, no one at all. But it was her _mother. _

Then again, that just worsened the situation. Finally, Ahsoka's lips parted, the words formed on them, and she rasped in fear that she would break down and just start crying all over again, "Yes."

Memories that did not belong to the mind of such a young child were fresh in Ahsoka's mind, and a guilt she had carried for years slipped away from her grasp. She hadn't killed her mother - she was alive. Ahsoka Tano, who had caused her mother so much grief, could finally let go. Past had met present, and she was not left in the darkness of her mother's fate.

Mai was at her side, and Ahsoka looked at her intensely, just in time to hear the tremor in her voice as she said in scolding tones, "Ahsoka, you are so _thin_. So is she. How did - I just - what happened to you?"

Ahsoka's lips mashed together and looked at the bed miserably. How could she do this? What had happened to her? She had become the very heart of danger for everyone she knew. But it just tumbled out - what had happened, what she had done, who she and Cala were. Cala had eventually crawled over and sat beside Ahsoka, looking shocked.

Arms wrapped around Cala, Ahsoka could only say, "I'm so sorry to do this to you..."

But Mai's voice sounded winded, and she whispered with tears streaming down her cheeks, "No, Ahsoka, no. I would rather die knowing you safe than not knowing that you were alive at all. In a way, you saved me."

Ahsoka smiled lightly, and she looked down at Cala. So maybe she wouldn't have to play the motherly role over Cala...and maybe she could see about fulfilling her goal as a peacekeeper. And Vader. Ahsoka's heart clenched.

**I am trying to lengthen these chapters. But I couldn't think of anything else. And I might have to turn this into a triology (but I wouldn't mind too much)  
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**Yes to CrazySmallLady's question - of course! :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**One Week Later**

"Soka," Cala whimpered whilst staring heatedly at the older girl, somehow managing to keep those brilliant purple eyes dry. She pulled away, and in her eyes, there was a little bit of anger. She didn't want to be left alone, though the night before Ahsoka had asked Mai to watch her while she completed a mission of some sort. Of course, Cala had urged her not to, but to no avail.

Ahsoka stepped back into the light, and Cala studied her critically; she appeared to have gained some weight and some muscle. In the late hours of the night, she would take out her lightsabers and review the seven forms. Some days, she had trained Cala, warning her to never leave her thoughts hanging in the Force, or else they might be found out. The young one would nod intensely, and Ahsoka had to admit, she had never once slipped up.

But some days - the days she was alone - Ahsoka's lightsabers would whirl faster than ever, more in sync than Anakin would've ever known, and on her face, there was anger and fear. There was also hope and joy, determination and peace. It was the one place where there was nothing but herself, and the Force. Together. No matter what she was feeling.

Cala loudly announced, "Why can't I go?" And Ahsoka smiled at the normally happy-go-lucky child. She always managed to seem happy in the roughest times. Except on the days she and Ahsoka had fought, or Ahsoka had done something...unnecessary

But now the young child looked infuriated, and despite her more mature acts from her background, Ahsoka was reminded that she was still six, (almost seven!), and still very young. Ahsoka backed up, and glanced up at her mother. It was further pressed to mind when the girl blurted, "Don't go!" as she suddenly lost control over her feelings.

Mai looked uneasy - she always had when Ahsoka was a child, and it appeared that trait still stood strong - but she looked quietly at her daughter in a way that suggested she was not truly a part of who Ahsoka was. They didn't _know _each other - they were so different.

Mai was a toughened - but wary and shy, also somewhat fearful - peasant woman who lived in a comfortable, homey world in a small circle of friends with a larger circle of enemies somewhere out there. She was not very trusting - well, nor was Ahsoka anymore - and wanted to keep things simple and morally correct. She did well caring for the hurt and the sick, as that was were many of her friends (and eventually her daughter) had come from.

Ahsoka was the former Padawan to Anakin Skywalker, also a former 'wild child' with a free, reckless spirit. She had mellowed some as the Clone Wars came to a close, but she never lost her fiery determination to do what needed to be done, or that she would do whatever it took, even if it meant death. She always tried her hardest, thus resulting in many narrow escapes and lectures from her over-protective Master _whom she trusted. _It hurt - it really did. It even hurt her as she tried to branch out. But also outspoken, Ahsoka could almost always worm her way out of situations, even though her insults didn't always help.

Ahsoka didn't trust Mai, not yet, not even after all she had done for her.

Ahsoka let her hand drop off of Cala's shoulder, and the girl looked up, misery shining in her eyes, "Don't worry. I'll be back." Ahsoka promised. _I promised Obi-Wan I'd check on her..._

Cala squirmed, and in her hands she tightly clutched the stuffed animal- thing - that Jenx had given her in the wake of Order 66. Ahsoka had no idea how she had hidden it; she had not seen Cala's toy in awhile. She had assumed the thing had been destroyed. "Can I have my lightsaber?" Cala whispered suddenly, and she didn't look so upset anymore. Now she looked eager, but she didn't see that her older friend looked appalled.

Ahsoka steered her further away from Mai and hissed, "No. Don't you remember last time? That was some mess you put us into. But that's not why - what if someone finds it, we're in trouble."

Cala hugged her animal tighter to her chest as she squeezed her eyes shut to hold back threatening tears, "You're my only friend." She whimpered pleadingly, "I wasn't trying to hurt you. I just wanted you to see..."

Ahsoka gave a short laugh, "I know you can fight well...though I proved pretty bad, didn't I? Ooh." Ahsoka winced, wondering why the tiny Togruta had thought in between the fear. Oh, well. She could only hope it wouldn't happen again. Suddenly serious, Ahsoka added, "You should make more friends. Ones that are your age."

"But..."Cala began to protest, looking confused. For so long they had not interacted with other people.

Ahsoka cut her off, however, saying, "No. It's not right to be completely cut off from civilization." Both girls knew that that Ahsoka was lonely, but wanted not to keep herself safe, but everyone else.

And she turned and started to walk to her starfighter, something she managed to pick up around one of the villages. She turned and looked back, and underneath the fake facial markings she had applied to her features, there was determination on her face - the kind that had always been there and only resulted in trying to prove to the galaxy that she would win.

Apparently, Mai recognized it, for she fidgeted slightly. That look when Ahsoka was a toddler meant trouble - and she had a feeling that she wouldn't be seeing her much anyway now, but she had to say, "Ahsoka, be safe. Don't do anything..."

"Unnecessary." Cala pipped up, and her tone sounded a bit wry. Ahsoka made a slight face at her before clambering aboard. She settled into the seat, and looked down at the controls. Cala had her arms crossed, fury making her features glow red. It was quite comical, actually, and Ahsoka had to turn away to hide her giggles. Not that she hid them _well_.

Beneath her fluttering fingers lay buttons and switches she had not touched in months. However, when her orange fingers flipped them down and into action, it felt right. She was a Jedi - one of the last, but she was. Grinning a grim smile, she took off in her rusty starfighter, and it occurred to her that she would have to hope that the thing could make it to Alderaan. Really, really hope.

But she took off, and Cala and Mai grew dimmer and dimmer until they vanished from view. For some reason, Ahsoka felt like she was hanging there, alone, like she needed them. Like she needed them to stay alive, to recover and grow.

She needed _people_, and interaction...but so much of her wanted to crawl away and stick her head in the sand, so to speak, so she might not ever have to worry about being hurt again. It would be difficult, quite difficult, but the girl was going to have to take a risk she actually did not want to take.

**Some Time Later**

Ahsoka had not been, to say the least, terribly happy on the trip over. Initially, she had been rather bored, but soon came to realize their was more work to flying without an astromech. She would have to work on getting one, and soon. Ahsoka looked down at her wrist where there used to be a comlink - sometimes that small device had saved her, but this time, it wouldn't. It couldn't because it wasn't there.

Her sapphire blue eyes looked watery, like the ocean, in the dim light, but Ahsoka could see perfectly well. She sunk teeth into her lower lip and gnawed on it worriedly as a large green and blue planet came into view. Memories of the cool atmosphere, the mountains and beautiful landscapes, but also somewhat foreboding because danger had laid on them because of Aurra Sing's attempts at killing Padme, pounced on Ahsoka.

She smiled a little, remembering how unsure she had felt, and how she felt when it was over. She thought she would never feel that way again, but she did now. Questions and thoughts like, What do I do now? or I can't be like them - it's just not me! mocked her now relentlessly.

Ahsoka landed in the forest and slowly withdrew her threadbare shawl. She held it away from her body, glancing down at her torn, blue clothing that she had changed into after she had come to Mai's, but still slid it over her head. The materiel was scratchy, and made her skin prickle. Ahsoka shuddered as she climbed out of her starfighter, and tried to ignore the itchiness as she began her trek to the palace.

Would anyone see her? Ahsoka didn't really want anyone to, for that might cause some problems. Breha and Bail would not recognize her with her smudged on facial markings, and slowly, the Togruta pulled her hood over her ever-growing headtails. In the time since she had ceased to be Anakin's apprentice, they had grown curvier. Not that much, but enough so that it was noticeable.

The palace loomed in front of on the horizon like the only beacon of the salvaged good left in the galaxy where Padme's young daughter was. Ahsoka closed her eyes, and in the Force, she felt the young girl's presence. It guided her slowly to the room in which she lay, up over the walls that Ahsoka easily scaled, and into the rooms.

Knowledge helped her find the surveillance cameras, because, of course, the young princess had to have that protection. Otherwise she would easily be target for any trouble, and as Ahsoka knew, Bail would not take that risk. Slowly, the Togruta crept to the small wooden crib, sneaking away from the camera's viewfinders. When she made it - not to the crib, but to the camera - she quickly rewired it, and fed it a loop. She would fix that later.

Then she moved to where the baby princess slept - young Padme's daughter, and - and Anakin's. Ahsoka held her breath as she stared at the five month and however many day old child, and relaxed. She was alright, and quite peaceful with her home, though as Anakin and Padme's daughter, she would not be one to act peaceful in such a meditative style at all times. She would be reckless and stubborn, and hopefully a little outspoken (like Anakin's apprentice.)

Smiling, Ahsoka ran one finger softly across the wispy, fine hair on the child's head. The girl's eyelids fluttered open and she gazed at the elder girl curiously. She was so young, so innocent, so perfect, with no one who had ever hurt her. Ahsoka stood, mesmerized, for one more second as Leia - Leia Skywalker, Ahsoka thought - grabbed her finger in chubby fingers and smiled sweetly. Ahsoka wormed her finger out of the girl's grasp and smiled, "May the Force be with you." Truly, that could have been a pathetic statement to a baby, but Leia needed it.

Ahsoka slowly backed up to the security camera, and with her small, nimble fingers, quickly rewired it, then scooted out of its view out the window where she Force-leapt and quickly sprinted to the woods and to her starfighter.

It was just too bad the starfighter was old, and Ahsoka forgot that little fact.

* * *

><p>It had been uneventful, at least until now, and Ahsoka was beginning to wish she had kept her patience in tact. She hadn't really wanted to start feeling like something was going wrong. And Jedi usually were right when they said something felt out of place.<p>

Ahsoka's eyes flitted around the cockpit, the Force screaming at her that something was wrong - well, that was obvious, because the second Ahsoka touched the controls, she realized they weren't working. She tried to bend the Force to her will, but it wouldn't help. She just continued to fly, and straight at a planet that seemed a little familiar.

Anakin had rubbed off her in more ways than one, and Ahsoka was glad of it, for when the small starfighter began vibrate intensely through the atmosphere, Ahsoka began to pull up on the controls, and hoped that she had enough intelligence and working ship to land without any severe injuries (or worse).

The planet grew immensely as ship and rider grew closer, and Ahsoka closed her fingerss tightly, her fingers whitening as she clutched the controls. She squinted as the terrain, and looking down at the city, was not at all pleased. She hoped that she wouldn't hurt anyone, but she had no time to really think. Ahsoka's breathing hitched as she yanked the yolk up, and the underbelly sank into the streets. Her body was tossed carelessly forward onto the console, and as the strong windows shattered as the ship flipped over twice, Ahsoka felt her various places of her body ripping open. Hopefully just minor cuts. At least she was tightly buckled in. She heard the screech of speeders and someone cry, "Idiot!" She had no time to be indignant.. Just hurried, harsh, breathing.

And ripping the seat belt off so she could crawl away as fast as she could. Rivers of blood trickled off her fingers - they seemed to have suffered the most - and she looked up weakly at the people. The blood pooled on the rubble, and more than one of them looked disgusted. It was kind of angering - if she really was hurt, she wasn't receiving much help.

Ahsoka flipped onto her back and scooted further away, watching as a spark of flame caught on the ship and the fire soon exploded within, devouring her starfighter in seconds. The small Togruta whimpered at the intense heat, but when somebody caught her arm, Ahsoka looked away and into the eyes of a wiry woman with a taut smile, "Come with me." She whispered to her, helping the girl to her feet.

The two limped through the shocked crowd who could do little more than stare at the pair, and Ahsoka attempted to not roll her eyes as she passed. Some people were so...well, they just didn't act. Ahsoka liked action more than standing like a stupid bantha. They left the gleaming city for rolling hills and immense forests.

The woman led her even further, and a red-headed girl who looked to be about twelve caught up, "Haji, who is this?" She demanded, and it was then Ahsoka noticed how closely alike the two looked. Haji, the taller one, leaned Ahsoka against a tree and then literally collapsed beside her. She fumbled in her tunic for a moment and pulled out a datapad and tossed it at the younger.

"This is my sister." Haji announced, studying Ahsoka with piercing green eyes, "Her name is Mikalya, and I, as she's already kindly given my name away, am Haji. This," Haji turned Mikalya, "girl crashed her an old starfighter which appears to have belonged to the Jedi a long time ago. She's Togruta, about fifteen standard -"

"Seventeen." Ahsoka interrupted, and Haji looked confused, "Togruta age slower than humans. I also am a little - I mean, a bit shorter. My name is - is Soma."

Haji's sharp face turned icy with annoyance, and the girl replied airily, "I know Togrutas age slower. You're very small for your age." Ahsoka's fists balled in anger at that. She was not _small_! Just...a bit shorter. Haji returned to Mikalya, "She also survived the crash with exceptional piloting skills, showing intelligence or perhaps mechanical talent. She's muscular, with a very...short temper."

Ahsoka leaped to her feet, and growled, "So you brought me here to insult me. I could've done better with the locals." She turned on her heel and was about to return to the city, but Mikalya grasped her ankle.

Haji opened her mouth to continue in her irritating tirade about what she could figure out about the Togruta before her, but Mikalya interrupted, "Ignore her. She thinks she's better than she is." Ahsoka was pleased to see that Haji looked knocked down a few notches, "We don't want to insult you." Mikalya continued, "But you appear different, as Haji noticed. Taller, even if you're short, and more, well, confident. Like you've got the Force with you. We want to know if you can help us." Mikalya handed her the datapad, and the first thing Ahsoka noticed was the Empire's symbol.

"You work for -" The girl blurted out in shock, holding the datapad as though it was covered in blood - well, it was now after Ahsoka's torn fingers had grasped it.

Haji jumped in grumpily, displeased at her sister's explanations and descriptions on herself, "No. We work against them. Sort of. Well, we want to know who they are, what they came from, and what's going to happen to our home. And us. We're also kind of bounty hunters. We hunt the bad guys, figure some stuff out. We stole it off of Vandalin. So, are you gonna help?"

Ahsoka scanned the DataPad, and readily replied, "Sure. If you tell me who you got this from."

* * *

><p>There were some days that Darth Vader, who truly was evil, didn't feel the menace he should be - like he had some part of him that was still Anakin Skywalker. Though he never really thought that way simply because he had destroyed the people who were close to him - like Padme. Not that he ever thought of her, either. Well, tried not to. He couldn't help it.<p>

As his new crimson lightsaber activated, he whirled on the blubbering bounty hunter and plunged it through his chest. The man looked up at him with glazed eyes before slumping forward and falling face first. At one time, the man beneath Vader's shell would have been horrified. Now, what he felt was pure power, but his life still felt...void. There was nothing but his own cruelty.

Slowly, Vader sheathed his lightsaber, walking by the dead man without even caring. He turned on the next bounty hunter, "Did you find her?" He boomed in his deep baritone, and though his voice could not be tinged with malice, it sparked fear in the man.

His lips parted to offer an excuse, but Vader did not stand for excuses. The lightsaber ignited, and he started at him before extending one hand to choke the man. His throat made gargled sounds as he struggled in Vader's grasp, and just before he blacked out, Vader released him. He snarled (somehow), "Find her, or else!" The man was smart enough to know that asking what 'or else' meant would probably ensure that he received it. So the man wisely took off, running as though Vader might change his mind.

After all, who knew?

Vader stopped suddenly, staring at the running man's back. He raced for his ship, never looking back, before blasting off of Vandalin - another reason Vader felt as though the menace within him was wearing thin. Although he fiercely tried not to think about it, it did cross his mind _once_ - that was it that this looked quite a bit like Christophis, with it's greenish blue towers.

But he wasn't Anakin anymore - the girl was an annoying brat when he had met her. He didn't want to see her, not now, in fear that he would soften. Vader's heart was a rock, and that was all. That's why the woman he was looking for was someone else. Maybe one day Ahsoka would join him and become a Sith, but he had pressed her away. She was nothing to him now. Or so he said.

But that other woman had stolen his list of enemy (mainly Jedi and a few bounty hunters who he didn't like) locations and taken them, supposedly destroying them. How dare she? No one was stupid enough to go against the Empire. He had caught sight of her briefly, claiming she was a bounty hunter after the fallen Jedi, and airily had asked if he knew of any main locations. Vader didn't care about people, but if he did, he would've said she was an annoying know-it-all.

The bounty hunter had taken off, walking in quick strides whilst calling into the shadows of an alleyway, "Time to go." He had never seen who the woman was talking to, but her clipped tones suggested she was in a hurry, or her correspondence was an enemy. Vader was so focused on the mysterious woman - something felt out of place - but he when a Storm Trooper shuffled over to him, Vader hadn't paid much attention.

"Sir," The man had spoken in formal tones without much personality. He was more like a droid than a man; the Empire had taken what little differences the clones had and destroyed them. It was rather unfortunate, but the Empire couldn't risk them disobeying orders, "The locations have been stolen, and several dead troopers found."

By then, the mysterious woman was long gone, and Vader had no idea of which way she had gone. He just knew it was her, and he had to find the Datapad. There was more at risk than a few bounty hunters, but if this woman got away with it. Vader's mechanical fingers clenched in rage, but his expression forever remained the same - a mask with one purpose. To provoke fear.

But what if - what if he wasn't provoking enough fear? He had to work harder. He turned to the nearest Storm Trooper, who remained as expressionless as he, and growled, "Go to the nearest planets around them. You'd better find them." Those bounty hunters he had sent were pathetic.

He'd take care of that later.

**Sorry for the late update! What do you think of Haji and Mikalya (pronounced Mik-ALE-ah)? Review! (Please?)  
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	4. Chapter 4

Ahsoka left. She seriously _l_eft (with the Datapad), though Haji (ever the spoiled rotten diplomatic) whined out wordy excuses...or perhaps not whined. Just...said. But whined made it seem all the better, because Ahsoka did not like her.

The problem was that Haji had tried to stop her whilst screaming at her sister, "You cannot beat our intellect, savage! Mikalya! What are you doing?" As it turned out, the younger hadn't been listening, rather staring off into space, rocking on her heels with her green eyes screwed shut, curiosity and concern on her small tanned face.

"Shut up." Mikalya had replied, deadly calm, "I'm thinking. Seeing." And her eyes opened, filled with unease, and uncomfortably she stammered, "We're, um, going to die. Apparently." When Haji started to laugh, though it sounded forced, Mikalya yelled, "Well, if you paid attention, you'd know! You never listen to me! And you know what? I don't care if you die!"

Haji's mouth opened and shut speechlessly, and then, her high pitched voice rang out, "You ungrateful...thing! I don't care if you die, either! I don't even know why I took you after Mother and Father died!"

Ahsoka sighed and rolled her eyes, pausing. Sisters. She had never been so selfish. She had never had the chance to act so foolhardy, to scream out insults suggesting such hatred. The Jedi did not live like that.

Ahsoka turned back. Haji was still yelling, her green eyes a blaze and sparking with electricity at her sister. But slowly the yelling died, and Mikalya looked up angrily up at the two, "Don't go," She commanded to Ahsoka. "Help me...please." What she meant, Ahsoka knew, was that with Haji, it was clear that the older wasn't going to be much help.

Ahsoka stared in shock - she didn't know the child at all, but the girl was insisting she stayed. The intuitive green eyes turned towards the south, towards a sea of orderly white, and Mikalya said, "Haji said you could help us, that you held the answer. Please."

Ahsoka didn't answer; she merely stared, stunned, as the clones, no, stormtroopers marched closer. It hardly seemed to be the appropriate time to do so, but she stared across the lines as though hoping one of them would say, "It's okay, kid." as though Rex was here, now. But Rex, like Anakin was dead. Dead. She repeated the word over and over in her head, praying that her mind would finally grasp the concept and she would forget this ridiculous hoping.

Order. She needed order, now. She wanted to just leave the two sisters to die, but Mikalya was staring at her hopefully, a little fearfully. Ahsoka's Jedi instincts that lay dormant beneath her skin, rippled through her body. Control. Precision. It felt right to grab the girl's hand, give Haji the most reproachful stare she could manage, and say, "There's no way we can defeat them all now, like this."

Haji looked at Ahsoka with disgust, "'The warrior,'" she said, as though mimicking at book, "'of many species, the predatory Togruta is skilled in combat, and...' well, we know that's a lie." She hesitated, then added for good measure, "Besides, I don't take direction from some child younger than I. But, it's my idea to fight, after all I am skilled in combat."

"Pleased to hear that." Ahsoka remarked drily, using the Force to pull a blaster into her hands from Haji's belt (when the young bounty hunter was sprinting without notice, of course). "I'm sure you're great."

Haji looked insulted, and added, "Well, fine. But if we get trapped here..." Her voice rose threateningly, her green eyes shiny with anger. And so they went, Ahsoka holding onto Haji's blaster furtively as she could from the intuitive young adult.

The farther they went, the more thorns cut their skin, dirt stained their clothing, and fatigue weighed them down. Mikalya, it turned out as they slowed to a walk, was incredibly wise, but understandingly so. Haji quoted books knowingly, only causing Ahsoka to roll her eyes all the more.

The sun hung on the horizon, and a slight wind swept through the wavy grasses, and lush plants. Finally, Haji's intellect failed her, and exhaustion consumed her body, only remarking something about some disease and she was quite certain she was showing some symptoms.

Mikalya slugged behind Ahsoka, quiet, tired. She didn't waste energy acting like a know-it-all.

The Togruta listened to the night sounds and thought she could hear a waterfall in the distance. Her eyes darted over a bush and she saw no water, but light, "There's another city in the distance." She called to the two bounty hunters, who didn't seem that up to wilderness survival. Only Mikalya looked a little diminished about the city.

Haji brightened, "Perhaps they will loan us a bed for the night. I am quite exhausted. We will offer them pay, of course, come morning, then will disappear."

Ahsoka sprung over the bush, muttering, "I doubt it, though we'll need to get somewhere by tomorrow. I'm going home tomorrow." Back to Mai, back to Cala. Home. Of course, that was if things went as planned, as they rarely did. "I think it would be better to stay here. None of us..." that was lie, Ahsoka could handle it, but Mikalya and Haji couldn't. "are ready to fight Stormtroopers if they're there."

"You could." Mikalya yawned, "Don't lie. But Haji's got a point, for once. Where do we sleep?"

Ahsoka hesistated again, slinking through the underbrush and the two girls stumbled after her until they found the waterfall. Ahsoka dropped to a knee and drank freely. As the water touched her cheeks, it turned red and brown from the blood and clay marring her cheeks. Horrified, the water slid from her fingers. The markings were still there, of course, and her's could not be seen, but the ones painted on were partially gone.

Thankful it was dark, Ahsoka dipped her tired legs into the pool, "Clean up." She muttered shortly.

Haji warily dipped her toes in, obviously cautious. Distressed, she grumbled, "So, what's the plan now?" Yawning, she added, "Sort of...nice, I suppose, on the muscles."

Again, Ahsoka's sapphire eyes rolled upwards, but Mikalya piped up, "Oh, hush up, Haji. It feels _good_. Would you please just get over the whole luxury thing for once?"

Haji replied darkly, "Honestly, don't you know what's in this water..."

"Molecules." Ahsoka grumbled through gritted teeth. She slowly stood up in the cool water, looking around for a moment, then, as Haji began to speak again, the young Togruta whipped around and sprayed the girl with water. Her fingers smoothly cast the spray over her, and Haji shrieked. Ahsoka suddenly found herself giggling. She'd tried that one with Anakin, only for his strong arms to push her below water in a dunk. No matter how many times she had tried, she could never dunk him smoothly.

Haji scowled again, but Mikalya soon was gasping for breath as she laughed. Haji sat, dripping, and clearly shocked. Her green eyes looked rather annoyed, but suddenly, her white hand cast a spray over both Ahsoka and Mikalaya. She smirked as though she had won, but Mikalya cupped her hands and lifted a handful of water and let it spray over her sister.

Without further ado, as if she had somehow forgotten, Haji lunged into the cool water, grabbing for her sister. Mikalya leapt out of the older girl's reach, taunting, "Ooohhh, Haji's _mad_." Then redheads began an epic game of chase, though Haji looked more enraged than amused. Ahsoka found herself ducking the girls' spray constantly, meanwhile edging towards a faint echo she heard behind the waterfall.

By the time she reached it, the two sisters were in full-scale war, screaming out terrible insults, swearing, and positively soaked whilst shivering in the chilly night air. Foolish, they had been, Ahsoka mused, feeling like Yoda. (On purpose, to be honest.)

Bracing her slim, tired body, the girl lunged through the cascading water, vaulting towards the inside. Her body didn't meet rock, but the - almost warm - interior of a cave. Crystals gleamed from the walls, but they weren't exactly lightsaber crystals. If they were, Ahsoka would be seeing her innermost fears, feeling her body...she stepped forward curiously, and instantly regretted it.

It was real, there was nothing fake about it. She was still in that cave, but there was Anakin, alive and happy, and Padme. Padme's ivory skin glowed with health, and her eyes were soft, but somewhat tired. She nudged her husband in the ribs, grinning widely, "Your turn." Slowly, the pillars of the cave melted into cream-white floors, and the spray of the waterfall grew hushed but still remained.

"Mine?" Anakin protested feebly, "Com'on, I swore I checked on them last time." But Padme laughed and walked away, shaking her head.

Anakin traversed up a set of beautiful marble steps to a airy green room. A slight breeze blew through the gossamer curtains in the far cave wall, and outside, the day was bright and sunny. The scenery claimed 'Naboo', and Ahsoka stared, perplexed. She watched as Anakin moved to basket and withdrew a brown-headed child with the same striking blue eyes. Anakin murmured to the youngling, and Ahsoka felt a stab of fear. Where was she?

Footsteps echoed in the cave, and Padme approached Anakin, placing a hand on his shoulder, "This is perfect." She breathed, "Finally, we can be together with our family."

Anakin smiled gently down at her without a trace a sadness, "It is. I made the right decision."

Padme sighed with a tinge of remorse, and crept into his embrace with the infant, "You were a wonderful Jedi, Ani. You loved it, and I wish you didn't have to leave." The surrounding seemed to grow to metal slowly, and the woman began to cry, "You gave up everything for me, and it wasn't even..."

Then Ahsoka, who appeared to have been there the whole time and not noticed, "Master," She cried out, trying to come closer to him. She wondered if he heard; he did, he turned to her in utter confusion. "Didn't you love me? Didn't you care?"

"Ahsoka?" He asked, almost angry, "Of course not. This is my life," He gestured wildly to the room, "I left you behind for a reason. Why do you keep following me?" He came closer, his face tightening. The infant in his arms wailed and everything disintegrated, even the baby. His hair was wild and unruly, his eyes flecked with gold. "Why?" He demanded.

Unlike the Sith visions, Ahsoka had a voice of her own, her own free will. She was a Jedi, and could not react with anger, "Because," her voice cracked and she wanted to touch him, wanted to hug him and never let him go, "You're my hero." She hadn't meant to say that.

The Sith laughed haughtily, "Your hero?" His face darkened, almost gray and began to morph into the monster Ahsoka had seen in her sleep so many nights, "Pathetic little girl."

Ahsoka bared her teeth in humiliation, and protested, "I'm not a Youngling, I was your apprentice. You were my friend." And then, in a voice so soft she wondered if the man even heard, "My best friend."

Anakin laughed, no, he was Vader now, he had to be, this couldn't be Anakin. She had loved Anakin as a Jedi, as her friend, as her brother, her father, her mentor...and he was gone. The young Togruta blinked back tears of agony, wanting this to end. She sprawled on her backwards, tripping over a rock, and saw that she was in the cave again. Vader cackled again, "You're a child! But," His voice became low and persuasive, and he whispered, "Join me, and we will be friends."

And to her horror, she replied 'yes', and then for some reason, he was calling, "Ahsoka!" In a pained voice over and over again. The white mist lifted, and wildly, Ahsoka screamed as she felt Vader's crimson lightsaber stab her body multiple times, saying she was a failure.

She whipped around and ran to the entrance of the cave, and Vader whitened out and became nothing. She stood, small and shivery in the front of the cave, but didn't cry. She straightened, and found herself looking into Mikalya's concerned eyes, and Haji's arrogant ones. The older teen leaned into the cave, observing the lightsaber crystals in wonder. "Don't go in there." Ahsoka said wildly, her eyes wide with panic, "No, no, come back. We'll go to the village, go elsewhere, anywhere but here..."

Mikalya ventured another step, and murmured, "Looks okay to me, and I'm not going to that village, Soma..." The younger girl fumbled with her belt and pulled out a minuscule light and shone it around, but she hesitated at Ahsoka, then started. "What's...makeup?" Fearful, the girl demanded, "Who are you?"

Haji whipped around, and her green eyes shone with confusion, then delight, "Looks a bit like something I saw in some of the HoloNews. A Jedi, by the looks of it. Skywalker's apprentice, correct?"

Ahsoka stared at her in anger, wanting to hit her for being so calm. but growled, "What's it to you?"

"So it's true!" Haji crowed, but when Ahsoka looked into her eyes, she saw wild, untamed anger. Her skin prickled from the heat of Haji's breath as the girl leered over her, "I'll turn you into Vader, that's what I'll do, Jedi scum.

"Why?" Mikalya asked instantly, confused, "During the war, Mom and Dad were on the Republic's side."

"So what?" Haji said in low voice, deadly calm with venom in her tones. "So the Jedi murdered my parents, they brought war to my home, they didn't save them...and you don't even care, Mika. They left me with you."

Ahsoka stared at the girl, perplexed and unmoving, slowly taking one step forward, and forcing Haji back. Her eyes held no fear, and Haji entered a realm without a Ahsoka, unknownst to Mikalya and all too familiar to Ahsoka, and then, her eyes lost focus, and she turned away and walked forward a few paces, and seemingly vanished from view.

"Haji!" Mikalya screamed in panic, but Ahsoka stood, arms crossed, waiting. Mikalya rounded on her, "What'd you do?" She screamed hysterically, throwing herself at the Togruta, "You - Haji's right, I know you, you're Ahsoka Tano, and you were Anakin Skywalker's apprentice. You - help her!"

"She'll figure it out." Ahsoka replied coldly, her eyes hard like two stones, smooth as day. It was plain that the former Jedi was not pleased at being discovered, and she knew she might pay a price quickly...but the girl was aware that neither of the redheaded sisters hated her. Not even Haji.

* * *

><p>She was alone, and cold, and wet...so tired. She stood in that cave and shivered, no longer in noticing the gleaming red, green, and blue crystals, nor even a few, very few, violet ones. Her parents were cowering in a corner, Dooku hovering over them, his red blade at her mother's throats. Again and again, he stabbed her, and again and again Haji was frosen in shock and fear. She was alone, and little genius who had no idea what to do. She cried like a child standing in that cave, and finally, she was alone, but in the cold rain.<p>

Frigid, the girl whirled around, sobbing, and then she saw a body on the cavern's floor. "Mikalya?" She croaked in horror, throwing herself at the motionless corpse. "No!" She felt so helpless.

Footsteps echoed through the columns, and she whirled around. A man with a red 'saber, laughing menacingly, "Your sister, was she?" He queried, "Not to worry, young one. Your pain will soon come to pass." And his scarlet blade rose, but white hot fury flooded the young woman. She attacked him violently with all the weapons she had, screaming in agony and angry.

And then he lay dead, and in her hand was a red 'saber, it was _hers_, and she could do anything. She could avenge her parents, her sister, anything she wanted. But she was a Sith, or an assassin, and that wasn't...what she wanted. She didn't want this future. Haji stared at her blood red blade, felt currents of hatred lap at her heart, but she was so afraid, so terribly of afraid of what she had done...

Then, Haji forced the blade to extinguish, and she leaned over and gasped for breath. She felt like she was going to retch, and she forced her sticky eyelids to close, but when they opened, in her palm was a crystal of an almost yellow color. Haji looked up, and felt as though she had suddenly materialized in another world. Ahsoka stared in shock, her eyes bugging as she stared at the crystal, "B-but you're not a Jedi!" She said, dumbfounded.

Haji ignored her, she just threw her arms around her sister, "You can't die." She whispered fiercely, "I'll make sure of that, you're all I have." She turned to Ahsoka with contempt in her eye, and screamed, "What in the bloody hells was that for?"

But Ahsoka never answered; everyone froze as a very familiar voice called, "Their over here, Captain."

Haji heard Ahsoka swear brutally as three stormtroopers burst through the waterfall, blasters aimed. The Jedi child reached through her raggedy robe, fumbled for a moment, and withdrew her neon lightsaber in which she used to mark and 'X' on the first ones chest. Horrified, Haji blasted the other two whilst dodging shots. "Now what do you propose?" Her voice shook with terror.

"I don't know, exactly." Ahsoka replied sarcastically, "I wouldn't be in this problem if it wasn't for that kriffing Datapad you just had to steal. Wasn't worth it, was it?"

Haji simmered in anger, but took her sister's hand, and growled low in her throat, "Let's get out of here." She tucked the crystal in her belt, albeit fondly, and lunged through the icy spray of water, tripping in it's cold depths. She heard Ahsoka join them above the chatter of her teeth, "Wh-where do we go?" She asked.

"A-anywhere." Ahsoka replied.

They ran for hours, avoiding voices that marked troopers, and finally took shelter beneath a fruit tree.

Ahsoka collapsed immediately, and though Haji still felt stabs of anger, she was surprised to see that the girl didn't seem all that invincible. Mikalya fell asleep, leaning on Haji, but the older watched the two.

She could see that Ahsoka was freezing; she had given her cloak to Mikalya, and was probably starving (she had also given a rations packet to Mikalya, which the sisters shared.)

The night was long, and soon it appeared that the Togruta was growing feverish. Just when Haji wanted to ditch her, just when she wanted to leave the girl to die, she felt pity.

**I'm sorry for the incredibly long wait and then the sucky chapter to follow. Next one will not only be sooner, but better. Again, sorry! **


	5. Chapter 5

Stars sparkled high above in the nighttime sky, gleaming just out of reach. They swam before Ahsoka's eyes, and her head pounded in exhaustion, in fatigue, and now that she had time - that vision. She feigned sleep, but only saw Anakin telling her what he had said, over and over again. It was her fault he was gone. Her fault! He hated her!

She hated Palpatine...wanted to wrap her fingers around his neck and strangle him, whisper her words of hatred...but she wasn't supposed to feel that way. She shivered, the cold in her bones, but it wasn't just the frigid, sharp air. Her thoughts swirled, settled, then rose up again. She was a terrible Jedi; she always had been. Plagued, and tired, the girl fell into a feverish sleep, somehow keeping distance between the sisters.

She dreamed that night, of the past, of what was not. Of her fears, coming to life, simple mockery, hurting her.

Vader haunted her. He mocked her during the night, and she saw Rex yelling, "It's okay, kid!", but then shooting her, lying to her. Then, his white armored fingers gripped little Cala's neck, and he flexed them. The child fell dead, limp as her little stuffed animal Jenx had given her, to the ground. Her body twitched once, then lay still. "No," Ahsoka whispered, then screamed, "You're all I have! I _need _you!"

She was a failure Jedi.

But then, who cared? The Jedi were extinct, gone, purged from the galaxy.

The scenes blackened. She was there, in Anakin's arms the night she hurt him in her sleep, finally, finally drifting off into a slumber in which she had felt safe. But the Voice, that Voice, the one she never wanted to hear again, screamed, "He's gone, Jedi, gone!" in mockery and in glee.

Ahsoka's blue eyes blinked open. So the Voice had foretold a terrible truth which had been real. That was why she lay here tonight, shivering and cold, with a bounty hunter who hated her.

Hatred simmered, and her fingers clenched and unclenched. Part of her, a more childish part, screamed that it wasn't fair. But she was angry, and lost...and angry for being lost in this world.

Ahsoka rolled over, and looked at Haji critically. The girl's long, blazing hair was mangled and muddy, and her green eyes closed. Her pale skin glowed in the dark night, and she groaned occasionally. Her hand trembled once, and then fell still. Mikalya, however, was riddled with sweat and silent, her face contorted in a look of pain. Sympathetically, Ahsoka's hand stroked her cheek, her fingers trailing on the waxy cool skin. She was beautiful, simple...so young. The way Ahsoka wanted to be.

She wondered where her optimism had gone, dwindled into the galaxy, maybe. Sometimes, she wondered if she would ever reacquire it - she actually spent much of her time waiting for it to come back. And she did feel that it was - though she still ached inside, the pain was less.

Her eyes looked in the night; the stars hovered, tranquil, gleaming as always. Perfect, innocent. Everything was slipping from her fingers, sand in an hourglass, dripping, falling. What Ahsoka wanted was to be herself, the snippy child, the child who had trusted who had acted so rashly. Who understand what it was like to laugh, to smile and dream. Slowly, she was gaining that, but only through what Mai and Cala. She needed them, desperately.

Mikalya whimpered; the chill was overwhelming. Ahsoka felt her training whisper, _You have to help her. _She didn't know how, though.

Maybe, maybe...well perhaps it was true. Perhaps, just maybe, she was afraid. She was clinging to what was already gone, clinging to what she had, and afraid of failing. She needed to be safe for Cala and for everybody. And so, because she was Ahsoka Tano, and not Anakin Skywalker, not the fraud Soma, not the worrisome adult, she resolved to _let it go_. To fight for them, and not take care of everybody, that was Anakin. It was his undoing and would not be hers.

"Where am I?" A small, weary voice cracked out of the dark. Mikalya was struggling to sit up, her bright green eyes squinting. She shuddered, wrapping the cloak tighter around her body, "Soma - I mean, Ahsoka?"

Ahsoka nodded silently, motioning to the child that she should be quiet; Haji was still asleep. Mikalya glanced at her and made a face at the older girl, and sighed. Finally, she spoke in her exhausted voice - the weather was not good, she was tired; surely her immune system was being shot and battered at. She was getting sick. "What are you going to do to get us out of here?"

"What am I going to do?" Ahsoka asked, cocking a white eyemarking, "I'm not the leader here."

Mikalya snorted, and coughed once into the crook of her arm, "Certainly not, but Haji seems to follow your lead. That's something. Anyways, there's no denying, you were a Jedi." She hesitated, "You are a Jedi. They still exist."

_...Still exist...you _are _a Jedi...you are more than a_ Jedi...you...are...The words wouldn't settle. Ahsoka crossed her legs and puts her elbows onto her knees, leaning into her orange hands. She smiled faintly, "The Jedi do still exist." She repeated softly, "Mika, remember the Datapad with the list of names...was my name there?"

Mikalya paled, her green eyes widening slightly, "Yes." Her young voice was hesitant and quiet, a touch worried. It was predictable, truthfully. "I'm sorry, but, uh, it said you were dead.."

"What?" Ahsoka asked in surprise, her sapphire eyes narrowing, one hand playing her her right headtail. It surprised her; she had assumed that the Empire would have her in first priority to be destroyed. "Well...um..." The Togrutan girl racked her mind, trying to find something to say, "Ah...so, about getting out of here. I have an idea."

Mikalya regarded her warily, then mildly muttered, "Great."

Ahsoka looked at her in surprise, and the word left her lips before she could think of anything better to say, "What?"

"It's going to get me killed." Mikalya said promptly, "Everything Haji does gets us into a life-or-death situation, and you're no different. Honestly, she's really brave. But she's so haughty." She spared her sister a glance, although tainted with a bit of grudging admiration.

"Who's haughty?" The elder asked in a sleep-filled voice. Haji's back cracked painfully as she sat up; she winced slowly, trying to shrug the pain away. It was easy to see that she wanted to be alright, that she knew that they were in for a bit of a venture. She stood, however, as though her body were delicate. Her slender fingers grasped the tree as she stood, her teeth sinking into her lip.

Mikalya wasn't much help. Brightly, obviously not to happy about their situation, she chirped, "You are. Anyway, since you always seem to know everything, what's the plan?"

Haji stared at her with blank green eyes, "What plan?" She asked groggily, holding a papery white arm to her mouth and yawning deeply.

The sun was on the horizon, hanging, painting the sky pastel colors. It was hopeful, and gentle, like sweet-tasting candy on one's tongue. Hope was what she needed, what Mikalya and Haji needed; what the galaxy required to every reemerge from the terrible fate it had been plunged into. Hope..."It won't get us killed." Ahsoka promised, "Well, at least I don't think it will."

Mikalya groaned again, louder this time, her milky eyelids fluttering over her green eyes briefly as she coughed again. "Great. Let's hear it."

"Well..." Ahsoka's voice trailed off; she didn't _really _have an idea; where was Master Kenobi when she needed him? (After all, Anakin's ideas had been rather...suicidal.) More so, a plan for her future, one she wished to fold Cala into, maybe even Mikalya and Haji...and later others. Problem was, she had to get off this planet first. "Well, we, um, we...ah. We go into town, I suppose, find some ship and...leave." Terrible, honestly. "But," Ahsoka continued to the better part of the plan, but she had barely formulated it, "I could train you to use the Force."

Mikalya rose an ginger eyebrow wanly, "That's a pretty broad idea," She said finally, blatantly. Ahsoka sort of smiled, a bit cheerfully. At least the younger hadn't said it was a bad idea...which it was.

Mikalya frowned, harder, "I didn't say it would work, or could work...we'd have to work on it a bit, I think." She hacked suddenly, breaking her sentence. She moaned once, something that sounded like, "I _hate _coughing." Finally, she looked up, crimson bangs in her eyes, her lashes making her look sweet and childlike, "As in, maybe, well...its a bad idea."

Once, a few months ago, that would've wiped the smile off of Ahsoka's face; she would have retreated, untrusting of herself. Now, she bit her lip and rose an eye-marking, and said, "Trust me. Please, it would be good for your sister...get her mind off of some things. It would give us something to do, it would help others." And, well, Ahsoka just wasn't cut out to be a stay-at-home sort of person. And she wanted to do something...now.

Mikalya stared into the distance, her green eyes half-closed. Finally, her lips parted, "Maybe...but you know the Empire can _feel _the Force, right? And how would it help others..."

At that moment, a rather disgust Haji cut in, "Right, for once Mika has a point. 'Sides, I need money."

"I lived," Ahsoka retorted coolly, "Without possessions until now - and a I still scarcely own anything. And then you come here and simper and...whatnot...while standing in that fancy suit."

"I don't simper." Haji looked aghast, "And it's hardly fancy; your shenanigans ruined it!"

That was it, the breaking point. Ahsoka stared at her, those stubborn eyes glinting for a fierce moment, then sparkling as she started to laugh...that girl...so pompous. It was hilarious. Until Haji hit her, the torn glove contacting with Ahsoka's skin. Laughter halted abruptly as Ahsoka maroon covered hand shot out, the Force coming naturally through her fingertips and throwing the older girl backwards. "Your...shenanigans..." she mimicked, "irritate me."

"I am hardly deterred." Haji mumbled, sitting up awkwardly.

"Surprise, surprise." Ahsoka remarked sarcastically, turning away from the limp older girl, whilst rolling her eyes again. Seriously. What was with these people

Feline-like, ever the gymnast, Ahsoka was on her feet in one smooth leap, but she held her hand out to Mikalya. She left Haji to clamber to her own feet, however, when she saw the redhead grimace at the dirt marring her hands.

She trotted ahead of the other two, her body seeming to undertake the fitness it had once had and almost try to live up to - actually, she had hardly lost any muscle; she had been working out. She had driven Mai crazy in the last week, wandering around, staring at things.

Finally, the city loomed below, and they stood on a hilltop like they were rulers on top of a the world. The wind flowed around their bodies, freedom from angst and guilt breaking over them. It was forgetful, it was perfect, until Ahsoka broke the silence, musing, "I bet there's a vent somewhere here into the city."

"What?" Mikalya queried, instantly curious.

"Like...septic." Haji shuddered, "I suppose." She looked at Ahsoka hopefully, as though the Togruta would shake her head in disagreement.

The alien child looked almost gleeful at the possibility of irking Haji more, "Could be." She chirped in response, grinning rather devilishly. Haji's face melted into disgust, but she nodded, "I guess it will have to do," She was incredibly resigned, and not at all supporting the idea.

Mikalya was even more curious, "Septic? Like..."

Haji stared at her in response, and nodded sharply, "More than garbage disposal." Ahsoka called over her shoulder, albeit distractedly. Her sapphire eyes glinted in the earlier morning, her intuitive eyes flitting over the region. There was indeed a vent, close enough to reach in a very short walk if they were not seen.

Her lekku quivered for sounds, and the left one throbbed - she had gotten an electrostaff slammed into it in her last battle before the Clone Wars era ended; not a fun way to go home, to say the least. "Well," She said, turning around, "We gotta be quiet." Easy for her - the sisters, not so much.

Slowly, after one last quip at Haji that was entirely disgusting and proved the Mikalya was fully aware of what 'septic' was, they set out. Then, Mikalya stopped dead, "Do we have to _walk _in it?"

Ahsoka did shudder slightly at the thought of that, but responded, "If we did, you could carry me."

Mikalya looked positively horrified, her whisper trembling, "You're joking. Right?"

Ahsoka was, of course, but her response was to give an undeterred grin and resume walking. "The faster we go, the faster we get there." She could practically feel Haji's smug satisfaction, but she let it rain off of her shoulders like slick water falling - though it was not easy.

The vent was rusty and rancid, but was not a sewer system at all, rather old tunnels to transport water. Though the murky brown stuff at the bottom hardly looked sanitary, and infested with who knew what, so the threesome crawled down and traveled along an old narrow sidewalk. None of them spoke; Mikalya stared wide-eyed at the water. The poor child still thought it contained waste products.

The walk seemed to stretch on forever, the tunnel only seeming to grow longer and longer with each passing footfall. At long last they paused at another hole, which Ahsoka threw her body up and peeked out. She thought of the Citadel, when she had called, "All clear," And it hadn't been...don't make the same mistake twice, she reminded herself. But she still said it.

The two redheads clambered out, and Mikalya cried indignantly, "Hey! It's dark in here!"

"Hush!" Ahsoka hissed back to the younger before creeping silently through the dark room; they were somewhere cool, a steel room. Finally, her orange fingers found a door, and because the Force was not ebbing, she took a breath and threw it open. And through it shut just as quickly.

Stormtroopers everywhere.

She backed up, her fingers scanning the wall again in hopes that she might find something of more use. Nothing, just a rusty ladder she'd dare not set foot on. The Togruta fell against the wall, feeling utterly hopeless. She would only succeed in getting Haji and Mikalya killed. Terrible, terrible...what an awful person, an awful Jedi...

The girl pressed her fists to eyes and willed herself not to wish she could be lead around again, willed herself to think, to make this work.

She didn't know how she didn't feel it, perhaps it was the stress of it all, but then there was a soft lilting voice that held the power of the Force. Ahsoka jumped, and pressed herself into the corner as she heard the, "Who is here?"

Ahsoka let her energy wash over the woman; she felt neither light nor dark, but serene and almost celestial. The woman did not retaliate, and her tone was slightly bemused, "Jedi? Thought the troops said all gone."

"I was trained in the temple." Ahsoka said vehemently, not even really thinking, "Doesn't mean I am a Jedi."

"Jedi is name, child. Air of Jedi is Jedi. And other two?"

"Friends." Ahsoka replied evasively. Her cyan eyes focused slowly in the dim light until she was looking into the eyes of an elder Twi'lek whose own eyes were a matching cloudy blue. Ahsoka startled as she gazed into those passive blinded eyes, and then asked, "Please don't give us to them."

"Why I do that?" The woman chuckled, "You right. Friends." She held out a gnarled hand, and though she could not see, placed in the right direction perfectly. Ahsoka slid her calloused hand into it, and with surprising strength, the woman pulled her up. "No worry." She said critically, "Why come? Tunnel here for refuge. Lucky you find."

"Very." Mikalya said shyly. Needless to say, she didn't dare speak out about the her thoughts on the septic system - well, almost. The child blurted, "But you might want to put up a sign that says it isn't a sewer!"

Haji elbowed her sister and hissed, "Enough."

But the old Twi'lek laughed again, and though her eyes were stormy and cloudy, they twinkled like a little girl's, "Sign, eh? People get suspicions then. What you come for?" Her laughter died.

"A ship, a way to return to Shilli." Ahsoka begged. She wanted Cala back, she didn't want to be wearing her tattered marron clothing, nor did she want to have to stay on this planet any longer.

The woman nodded, "Man lives close. Can help. Come upstairs." The woman, ancient as she was, swung herself up the ladder. When the three teenagers didn't follow, she called, "Coming?"

Ahsoka's fingers rested on the rusty ladder she hadn't trusted - she hadn't trusted in awhile, but her gut told her to trust the woman. And so, frightened as she was (though she was not frightened! At least she told herself.), the girl followed rather adamantly.

The room here was light and full of high tech machinery, "No touch." The woman warned, threading her a way through it with amazingly lithe reflexes. Ahsoka could practically feel the Force rising, touching each object as she passed.

Mikalya clung to Haji's arm behind the Togruta teen, staring with wide eyes at the woman. They entered a room with hard steel benches, but the woman paid no mind as she sat down, "Who you?" She asked Mikalya and Haji, touching each of then in turn with the Force, "Not Jedi. But Force."

"I'm Mika." Mikalya announced, "This is my sister, Haji." She settled back, regarding the woman warily, "You can't see."

The laugh came again, patient to the end, "No. I see. I not able to look, but can see. You not see. You not know Force. Have Force, but not know Force."

Haji shrugged warily, "We've picked some up."

"Yeah, some." Mikalya echoed, looking rather indignant.

Ahsoka continued to gaze steadily at them, and she knew the woman understood. The sisters could occasionally feel things in the Force, and had maybe even learned how to levitate they way she had when she was a child, but they hadn't learned to dissolve into it.

The woman's wrinkled finger tapped an object on her wrist - a Commlink! - Ahsoka was so relieved to see civilization she hardly realized her excitement was ridiculous. "Adair, company. Need ride."

The voice that replied was languid and rather easygoing, "Sure, Meme. How much they got?"

"Adair, get here. No greed." The woman said sternly.

"Ah," The boy complained jokingly in response, and the teenagers could practically see his easy-going grin, "You know I was kidding. Meme. Anyway, I'll be there in a minute."

Literally, a few moments later, a chocolate-eyed boy with sandy blonde hair stood in the doorway. He looked ot be about sixteen, and he wore old, too big clothes, and an easy going grin. He, too, had a Force-presence. Ahsoka could feel his eyes sweep over her and her tattered clothes, and so could the woman Meme, "Look with Force, Adair."

"Sure." Adair agreed, then promptly used the Force to overwhelm her. He sent out a flash of energy so mind-boggling she had to blink several times- what was that?

Meme scowled at the boy, "Adair."

"Sorry." He turned and beamed at Haji and Mikalya, "Oh! Redhead sisters. Double trouble, I take it?"

Ahsoka stared at Haji. The girl's green eyes were wide and intent as she took in the older boy, "No," She replied softly, then flushed madly as she turned to the ground. Ahsoka almost giggled at the older girl.

"We'll see," Adair replied, beaming again. "Well, passengers, all aboard." He turned on one heel before smiling with as much wit and charm as he could muster at them, "Follow me. You comin', Meme?"

"Said so, didn't I?" The woman replied gruffly, and again, with amazing agility, was on her feet.

"When did you tell him?" Mikalya demaned as they slid through the machinery and into another tunnel. She seemed rather dazed; she wasn't the only one. Ahsoka was considerably subdued.

"The Force is wonderful thing."

**I am getting a lot of OCs. Mainly because I actually decided I don't like writing the two sisters out a whole lot, but I think they could balanced out. And, 'sides from that, I am a terrible, awful person for promising to update and not doing it, and not even getting online. JK. I am a busy person, not awful. But. That means pleaseplease_please _review because it means I'm happy and more updates. =) And at least its my longest chapter I've ever written. =D  
><strong>


	6. Chapter 6

Mikalya had never seen her sister so quiet, never actually imagined that the girl could manage such a feat, yet here she stood with wide, green eyes. Eyes that were locked on Adair's back. The girl Ahsoka, the odd, strange, Jedi child, was sitting in the copilot's seat and was also silent - though it almost seemed she wished for the two of them to go in the back.

Meme had long since retired after they settled on the _Final Decision_, scolding Adair for his cocky narrow miss on a run in with Stormtroopers. Not that getting out had been easy, mind. But perhaps Adair had been rather stupid. And now Haji couldn't keep her eyes of him! And Mikalya had to resent him for that.

Maybe because Mikalya did indeed love her sister - she practically clung to the girl, after all - though she would fiercely deny it if anybody ever said she did. But now her sister wasn't even paying her any mind - she just saw that _boy_, that boy who was sitting there, sipping a glass of blue milk leisurely. He never tossed them a backwards glance, not one, and yet Haji was almost drooling over him.

"Come to the back with me." Mikalya finally said, tugging at Haji's black body suit. The older girl flinched and scooted away slightly, still studying Adair's back. "Haji!" Mikalya said, then louder, "_Haji!_"

Haji started, her green eyes torn away from the ratty shirt Adair had draped upon himself, and stared rather impassively at Mika, "Let's go." Mikalya said, then dropped her voice to a whisper, "We gotta talk."

Haji nodded, almost locked in a ridiculous mindless daze, then followed Mikalya out the door. Soon as they had come to a small cabin, Mikalya whirled on her and pounced, "You like him." She was revolted - that much could be seen in her voice - and not only that, quite upset. "What is with you? Don't trust anybody, then fall for some guy who's probably uneducated?"

"He is smart." Haji replied defensively whilst crawling onto a bedroll, "And kind."

Mikalya flung herself onto the opposite bedroll, laughing a harsh, fake laugh, then falling silent. The young twelve year old girl was scared - who wouldn't be, after her run-in with Stormtroopers who turned out to be guys in white-plated armor without feelings at all - what kind of person was like that, anyway? And, of course, there was her venture in the would-be sewerage tunnels, and the blasters, the cave - the fatigue - and, she had managed to hide her coughs after the initial morning, but now she just plain felt _awful_.

Haji seemed to be emerging from her daze, and her moonlit-colored skin flushed an awfully deep red. Her fingers crept to her cheeks and she pressed her palms into them, "I apologize," She whispered to Mikalya, "If I was being a fool."

The red-haired girl promptly scowled, "You definitely were." She gathered the covers about her and snuggled underneath. The warmth was an overwhelmingly pleasant feeling to be immersed in; her eyes fluttered closed, and even though her nose felt slightly stuffed, and her head pounded, it was so good to be sleeping. Perhaps Haji was right; beds were indeed nice.

* * *

><p>The boy was sitting with his legs thrown over the armrest carelessly, and one arm behind his head, the other holding a glass that he straining to catch the last drops of blue milk out of. Finally, apparently he gave up - Ahoska resented that, she was not going to give up on anything at this point, especially in figuring Meme and Adair out. Adair slammed the glass into the console in feigned frustration, then promptly grinned at her, "So. What's your name, Jedi girl?"<p>

Ahsoka scowled at him; she disliked being called 'Jedi girl', but she still sullenly muttered, "Ahsoka."

"Ahsoka." Adair nodded to himself, then thrust his hand out to Ahsoka. Warily, the Togruta extended her hand into his, all the while watching him. Adair hardly seemed to notice, "I'm Adair, as you probably know. I'm almost eighteen, you?"

"Seventeen." Ahsoka replied, still deeply on guard. She had inwardly winced at giving away her name; who cared at this point if she uttered her age.

Adair nodded, then leaned back in his seat again. Ahsoka's cyan eyes followed his fingers; they were snapping as if to conjure something, and the boy said languidly, "You were trained a Jedi." It was a statement; Ahsoka waited, "So. How'd you fair Order 66?"

Ahsoka was slightly taken aback; did she dare tell him that Darth Vader had spared her as she was Anakin's Padawan? Hardly. But Adair spoke first, "Just so you know, I'm aware that Skywalker was your Master. Talk about Force-Sensitive." The boy whistled slightly, then smiled, "Not that technical stuff all matters in the long run."

A pop resounded from his fingers and a spherical ball of lightning leaped from the tips and bounced from finger to finger. Ahsoka's eyes widened; she, of course, back away from the electrical ball in surprise, "How did you do that? Does it hurt?"

Adair grinned as he threw the electrical ball into the air, then caught it and smothered it in his fingers, "'Course not. I do it with the Force - and it's not dark energy, Jedi girl. Like you probably think. It's simply energy, nothing too hard to understand."

Ahsoka was admittedly transfixed, and without really thinking, asked, "Energy?"

"Sure." Adair said readily, still smiling lightly, "Isn't any secret. You've probably seen a dead body, right?" Ahsoka nodded mutely; she had seen several, and was not too keen on carrying on a conversation revolving around that subject - the bodies littering the floor of the Jedi Temple came to mind. "Well," Adair continued, "Say a person has lots of energy, even if they don't have the Force, you can actually see the energy leave the deceased body. And if you do have the Force - say you've made your energy completely neutral, it's all unbiased. Basically, you completely, fully understand the Force, then when you die, your whole body will dissipate and you will continue to dwell in spirit. People call it different things, they learn it different - really, it all depends on who you are and where your exact center is."

Ahsoka frowned, rather darkly, and said, "Well, so are you trying to say there actually is no dark or light side?" She stared intensely at the lax face, who was focused more on juggling his small, snapping electrical balls then the young Jedi girl beside him at the moment. Ahsoka's skin crawled as the blue sizzling energy swirled around his head, and his only response that she had asked something was to concentrate harder one his 'toy'.

Ahsoka turned form the vague boy and frowned at the millions of stars bolting, it seemed, at her, then whizzing by. Barriss Offee used say there was no light or dark side - it was simply the Force, and one would just live in it and become it, for that was the way of the matter. However, much as Ahsoka respected the idea, she had not believed it. Now it seemed the Miralan, however dead she might be, did indeed have company.

Plaintively and out of the blue, Adair spoke, popping his snapping electrical currents one by one, clearly amused by his game, "Yes and no. People can use the Force for 'light', or good, or 'dark', or bad. But really it's all one essential thing." Barriss's belief, Ahsoka recalled, albeit sadly.

"So Force Lighting isn't a dark side technique?" Ahsoka asked quizzically, inwardly detesting her pure fascination with this very un-Jedi boy - who almost, in some very odd ways, reminded her of Jenx.

Adair laughed, and said, "You've obviously suffered- don't get me wrong, you're no child. Well, in most ways, I'll assume, but I gotta admit - you're still a bit naive. Not as much as others." He relented, "But nonetheless."

"I'm naive?" Ahsoka shot, unnerved by the boy's statement, "Hardly."

Adair grinned, then began tapping a fingernail incessantly against the console in mild boredom, "You are." He countered, though it hardly seemed like an argument - more like he was speaking of the weather. It was purely annoying the Togrutan warrior, and made her feel very childish indeed.

"Prove it." Ahsoka's voice trembled daringly at him as her ocean blue eyes narrowed onto his - though he never responded properly, merely shrugged and said, "Sure." Then he fell silent once more, probably, Ahsoka fumed, to provoke her more.

"Well?" She finally asked, her voice rising. Her long fingernails, cracked and caked with debris, dug into the seat as she glared at the other passenger who showed no annoyance, no anything, at the Togruta.

Finally, he replied, "Well, you don't have a center yet - you're seem closer than some Jedi." He laughed a little as he said, "Some Jedi found their center just being Jedi - it was their personality. But then they let something get in the way, and it all fell apart, you know? Any way, that, you don't know Force lightning, you can't see with the Force - Jedi girl, Meme is such an expert at that - you don't understand just picking it up, letting it flow through your limbs, directing the currents of energy. Bam, you can hit people's minds with it. 'Mazing stuff, really."

Ahsoka frowned at him rather in annoyance, and grumbled, "It is biased, though. I mean, you learned it from Meme, right?"

"Sure." Adair agreed, not at all perturbed that Ahsoka had dared called his usage of the Force 'biased'. "But that doesn't mean it's biased, especially because the Force is different for everybody. It's about you, not everything else. So, yes, me telling you that the Force is relaxed, a laidback thing, could be wrong."

Ahsoka slid her arms across her chest, still rather sulky that this boy - this childish teenager, this person - could know more than her when it came to the Force. But how that be true? She had seen so many die - she had trained under the best Jedi.

Adair grinned at her - again! - she thought sulkily, never angry at her feelings though he could surely feel them rise off of her in torrents, "You're angry." He seemed positively amused, "Don't you think that you should be careful - say your Master could still feel you?"

"What do you know about my Master?" The girl shot, anger evident in her voice. Her eyes glittered as her temper, the temper she had been taught to wrestle into nonexistence, the temper that came with a stubborn streak, flared up suddenly. Adair was nearly in hysterics.

"Teenagers." He chuckled, though he appeared to be forgetting about himself - oh, right, Ahsoka amended sarcastically. He was special, better than her. Continuing, Adair asked, "What do you think I am, stupid? Duuh, I know that Anakin Skywalker is Darth Vader."

Fuming, Ahsoka growled, "What else do you know, if you already know that I'm Ahsoka Tano?"

"Well," Adair said easily, "I know that you aren't exactly a traditional Jedi - Meme was a fan of you for a while. I think, at least. She never actually said so, but she's Meme. You're a Togruta. You fight using Reverse Shien. And you appear to be proud of it." He added when Ahsoka jutted out her chin slightly in an arrogant yes-and-that's-the-way-it-is sort of style.

"I'm not proud." Ahsoka countered, "And I don't believe that my Master can feel a thought I'm thinking." She glowered at the boy, waiting for him to contradict her and tell him that she was wrong - Anakin - Vader - knew exactly where they were, and he was waiting...Ahsoka squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block the mental picture of Vader's cold fingers clutching poor little Cala's throat tightly, strength killing the small child.

Adair glanced at her, almost in concern, but he didn't go on in such an easy manner - he spoke rather cautiously, as though he recognized that to provoke Ahsoka now would be a rather stupid - perhaps lethal - mistake. "No, your former master to can't feel you. His energy has changed, so has yours. Normally when you change, and your bonded, your connected every second. But neither of you has opened the connection in awhile, I presume."

* * *

><p>Adair had been absolutely correct about everything else - he was fortunate, quite a bit so, actually - because that little bit of Anakin Skywalker, so smothered and mushed, had felt Ahsoka.<p>

Darth Vader had been slaughtering Stormtroopers with his merciless hand, watching them die, for they had not done as he wished - they had let her get away. They had let that liar bounty hunter go with his plans and Datapad, and all he had left was faint memory.

Then he had hesitated, crimson blade trembling at Stormtrooper's throat, ready to strike, but he was preoccupied suddenly.

Her voice - her voice, the way it got when it rose with anger and pride, because she knew she was right, she would not let the other party win. She had said she wasn't proud - even Anakin would snort as such a comment. Chivalrous, Vader thought, plunging his ruby blade into the white armored chest. His endless eyes never blinked, simply watched the shell of the man sink to his knees, blood leaking from the cut. Dying.

Every man who died in front of him was killing him.

But Vader didn't care, he turned, his black cape hovering and floating behind him perfectly, beautifully, before falling in a wonderous graceful arc behind him and floated as he walked.

He had only heard her - obviously she was angry at someone, for her mind had opened and allowed him to dissect the parts - how he used to try to do that, to see that she was safe.

Enough, Vader ordered himself. The Togruta girl was surely dead, and even if she was still a survivor, he had no welcome in the past. It was done, over, and only brought torrents of pain. Perhaps his killing, his anger, his hate was all merely an addiction, for it ended it all...the sorrow the welled up inside of him, the grief that locked his heart and turned it to steel when all he could think of was her. Padme.

Enough.

Then he saw a tiny Togrutan child...and it was all over...all he would ever recall was the brilliant flash of violet, the way it almost seemed if one could dive into those eyes for the held legions of power and wonder and precious secrets.

Enough.

He was spent, done with this. Screaming in rage, his red blade, the color of blood, swept through several more clones' bodies, and he was left heaving. He was a monster, he knew that, but it was the only way he could bear to live.

* * *

><p>When it happened, Cala was positively horrified. First thought - a jubilant happiness in succeeding her enemy, but the second thought was not good. At all.<p>

Mai was going to kill her. So was Ahsoka, if she ever returned.

The little Togruta shook the thought from her, and the fears felt like water sliding off of her shoulder, slicking down her arms - but her small stomach still clenched, and she screwed her eyes shut for a moment. Ahsoka _would _come back. She would, for after all she had come, broken and beaten, after the wake of Order 66.

It hurt - what could be expected of a six year old, anyway? More than this perhaps.

Mai had forced her into a small school for younger children - Ahsoka, apparently, had given her okay - and she had met a Togruta boy who was seven and found it his duty to torment her as much as possible. In front of everybody. Then he had the nerve to follow her home, saying she wasn't nearly as tough as she made it out, who did she think she was, anyway?

And she had turned around, in a lithe, graceful fashion, smirked the way she had seen Ahsoka do so often, curled up her fist and promptly whaled him in the face for all her small worth.

Force, what a bad idea.

What a terrible, _terrible _idea. The Togruta boy lay on the ground, moaning, with crimson blood smearing his fingers. Finally, his eyes - a navy blue that speckled like the stars in the night sky - blinked open, and he stared at her in stun. Horror crossed his young features, and he slowly pushed himself to his feet, regarding her, it seemed, in respect.

Cala wouldn't have it, though...for she saw a sulky look on his face, a look that clearly said, "I'm telling mommy!" So one orange fist grasped the color of his shirt, and she said, the Force in her voice, "You won't tell your mother I hit you...you ran into a tree."

Apparently, the child was not as developed in the Force as she liked to believe, for the boy snorted, "Liar."

"Ra'shaal?" A voice broke their thoughts, and it was not a voice that Cala wanted to hear - she wanted nobody, to be honest, but this voice was sugary and kind - too sugary. Ra'shaal burst into tears rather quickly, and sobbed heavily as he flew into the woman's arms.

"Mama." He cried into the hem of her dress, "Oh, Mama, she hit me."

The woman moved away from him, ignoring the blood smeared on the folds of her dress, and slowly knelt to his level. Her tender fingers, the color of flame, gingerly felt his nose before turning to Cala in fury.

Cala gulped; not good, not good. "He started it." She said stoutly.

"What's your name?" The woman was cold, fierce towards the girl...menacing even. Suddenly aware of her small size, the girl took a step back, her vibrant eyes wide at her.

But her chin was already set in defiance, and she no longer found her name a danger. Freely, she replied, "Cal," nonetheless. She crossed her chubby arms in mock anger, and then she found Ra'shaal's gaze - he looked rather interested.

The woman tore into her, insults hitting her faster and harder then punches would have - let's not say the blows didn't hurt. Cala, was, after all, a child. And children do not enjoy being told they are 'monstrous', 'unworthy'...or anything worse and of that sort. Yet the girl withstood it, her back braced, her teeth in her lower lip, and when the tirade had finally subsided, she promptly swore at her.

That would not go over well with Mai or Ahsoka either.

Nevertheless, the woman, apparently, was spent. Either that, or aghast at the child's apparent bitterness and lack of regard towards the names one could be called. "Ra'shaal, let's go." She spat, her eyes flashing with annoyance.

Cala waved sweetly, however, and said kindly - though mother and child could tell it was laced with malice, "Good-bye, Ra'shaal. I'll see you tomorrow."

The boy did not reply, rather tucked himself into his mother as if she were a haven - some haven, Cala thought cynically before turning on her barefeet and trotting down the path to Mai - and hoping the woman did not find out she was the 'mystery child' adopted to Mai.

Otherwise...well, she didn't want to think about that.

* * *

><p>On the opposite end of the spectrum, there was a woman - an elder woman who looked human (almost) but was not. Much as she tried, she could not instill quite the Force into Adair as much as it resided in herself.<p>

There was a mystery about this woman - to begin, her real name was not Meme, rather Zendaya - and she indeed used the Force as her eyes.

She was part Miraluka, a Force-Sensitive being born blinded, in fact, without eyes. However, she had inherited the eyes but not the vision. Quite unfortunate, her mother had sneered, for she was the one who could see. And she had been left with her father.

Zendaya initially resisted the Force, despised it with all her being, for it was the reason she was a blind foreigner of an odd planet. But she could never rid herself of the odd tongue she spoke, the Miralukese language, though she picked up some Basic whenever she could. She thirsted for sight, and knowledge, and slowly she gained it when she finally listened.

Miraluka didn't always believe in the Force the way Zendaya did - yes, they 'saw' things in it, but some would not become what Adair had so vividly described to the Togruta Ahsoka. No, they chose their own paths. But once Zendaya's father died, she had been taken in by a wise man who had given her what he called the gift of the Force.

And on his deathbed - for all died, though he would commence to dwell in the Force - he had uttered those words and tole her not to be so hasty to cry - and then his breathing had become shallow and then finally, raggedly, stopped. And she had cried, until he had come to her in a hazy blue form and proceeded to tell her that she only brought shame if that was all she could manage with his teachings. Kind words did not make that man up, not at all.

So she had trained pupils, taught then to delve into the Force, to be the Force, to see through...all of her students had been Miraluka. Except for one, and she had believed he would be her final trainee...until now, until she had met that Togruta. And those two redheads...the Force was mysterious indeed.

It had, after all, led her to a human boy who she taught, though he never quite fully grasped the seeing through the Force. It just wouldn't come to him, his eyes, after all, would catch the object and proceed to view it...he was not a Miraluka. He was not her, but was special nonetheless. It would not be a lie to say Zendaya loved him like a son. He did, after all, call her 'Mother' in some language he had known as a toddler.

So he had grown under her care until now - and then he had to go and make some could-be fatal mistake, telling Ahsoka Vader wouldn't be able to hear all her thoughts.

She had not, most likely, closed the connection to his mind. She was rash and angry in that moment - vulnerable - and he had provoked - Zendaya frowned slightly. She stood at the door, listening, and then sighed.

_Adair, after you and I going to talk. Least once you get way. __She sulk?_ Zendaya whispered into the bond, then waited a moment, two moments...then a gloomy sigh.

_Sorry, Meme. I really am. But it's fun to play around...and I wasn't teasing that bad. I was explaining the Force! You should be proud of me. I'm passing on my teachings! _

_Sure, _Zendaya thought back drily, _sure, Adair. Whatever say. You made mistake, you know. Explaining._

There was another hesitation, then another groan. _Was it bad?_

_Could be. _Zendaya retorted, then eased back onto her little cot, though she didn't tell Adair she doubted. Vader would be too afraid to face the past and find Ahsoka anyway...but of course, in this galaxy, no one could assume anything.

**I'm impressed with myself...didn't wait months and months to update. ;) **


	7. Chapter 7

She stared up at the woman with tried contempt, but truly, she liked Mai. Mai was the mother that Ahsoka wasn't, the mother she had never had. But sitting at the counter, swirling a glass of water in her hands and feeling the cold condensation did little to improve her already bleak mood. She wanted to know how Cala's day went, and the child wondered it she knew, or it was a conversational question. Tentatively, the girl muttered, "I hate it."

Mai glanced back at her, and the small woman suddenly reminded her of Ahsoka - the glittering flash of blue eyes, and then her expression settled into an uneasy worry. "Why?"

Cala began tracing circular patterns for fear that she'd end up in tears, faster her red fingers twirled, her stomach aching in sorrow. Her eyes fluttered shut as she recalled the children dying in the Temple, their home becoming their prison, and finally, their graves. Among the deaths, her own friends had felt the heat of Skywalker's blade as it drove home.

But beneath the shell of hatred and red hot agony, the color of a Sith blade, she could hear laughter, feel the gray smoothness of her training lightsaber. She could still reminiscence sweet smiles of the children younger than her, the heated arguments and dares she had with her friends. The giggling, the training, it all seemed so familiar and out of reach. It was her culture, the way she was raised, and to put in simply - she did not feel like she was one of these people. She didn't want to be a Togruta.

That was why she hated it.

Because it wasn't her Temple, it didn't have her friends, or her training. It was all so narrow-minded and simple. "I want to go home." She said finally, and cautiously looked up at Mai. The woman's delicate fingers touched the tips of her montrals, and at Cala's silent consent, she brought her closer, "I know." The woman whispered. Cala regarded her closely, knowing she rarely left Shilli, if ever. But when she said, "It must be hard, changing everything in a blink of an eye, it all going wrong and you can't figure out why it's going like this, where the trust once dissolved..." Cala could feel the emotion in the Force, and wondered what Mai was relating to, but now seemed not the time. "I feel bad for both of you." She said simply, "If there's anything I can do."

"I want to go _with _Ahsoka!" Cala exclaimed in annoyance, "I want to do what I was supposed to!"

"Supposed to?"

"Save the galaxy, fight...be trained so that one day, I'll be more than that little kid that Pad'wans always point at." Not that they pointed anymore, because they were dead.

Mai chewed on her lower lip; Cala was so little she could barely comprehend the whole spectrum of emotions, at least in complex beings, but she could see the worry, "I'm sure you will. Both of you are cut from the same materiel."

"Whats _that _s'posed to mean?" Cala replied indignantly, thinking perhaps Mai had insulted her (she had been on her guard for the past week with the other kids, and it was easy for her to be offensive even to kind, worrisome Mai.)

"You're alike. Anyway, back to the original question - How'd school actually go? Did you get along with anybody, did you cause any trouble?" Cala looked at her suspiciously, wondering if she could possibly know, and gulped her drink quickly so she would wait to answer, but first whined, "I'm hungry!"

Mai pushed some leather-like jerky at her that she removed from her earthen cabinets, but waited nonetheless, watching the little Youngling for signs of remorse or guilt. But the child replied by realizing the jerky - rat, maybe, she thought - was tough to chew, and gnawed on it so she would not consent. "Cala." Mai said.

"Of course I didn't get into trouble!" Cala said, hiding the rest of the food in her glove and finishing the water so she could flee to her room, "I'm good!"

"Sure." Mai watched the retreated child, and sighed, rubbing her forehead warily. She longed to tell Ahsoka that this petulant troublemaker was not what she had in mind when she agreed to watch her. She splayed her fingers out, and looked at the grim in the creases and laid her her head done. Because she would protect Cala no matter what - the problem was, she was so precariously close to having to let the little girl go; it was a matter of time before the child took off whether she (or even Ahsoka) liked it or not.

The child looked at her from the doorway down the hall, and said in a quiet voice, "I don't want 'Soka to forget about me." Mai looked at her, eyes softened and sad, and said, "I'm not sure she could." _But there's always me...and I've been out of her life so long, what's it matter?_

* * *

><p>"So you were wrong." Ahsoka said, albeit smugly. She had her feet propped on the console for no other reason than to provoke annoyance, but Adair didn't seem to care. Nor did he pay any mind to the Togruta teen's accusations, not that they were terribe (to him). He shrugged, "Yeah. What's that saying? You never stop learning? Meme's always been a firm believer of that."<p>

"Nobody's always right." Ahsoka said in clipped tones, "Not even _you_." She couldn't recall ever being that completely blunt, but she hated him so much right then that all she wanted was to provoke, wipe the easygoing charm from his lax features. But not so much as a flicker of irateness crossed his young features. "I know." He said plaintively. "I call it confidence - they're two very different things, Jedi Girl."

Ahsoka scowled at him and said, "There's such thing as _overconfidence_."

He looked bemused, "Are you talking about your downfall in the duration of the Clone Wars? Please. Spare me. At least you've matured some." He scrutinized her closely, and then whispered, so that just her lekku could pick it, "Or maybe you're just as haughty as some others here."

Ahsoka was failing at resigning her emotions, she was simmering and seething and detesting him with every once of her being (and disliking herself for it; she was being rather out of character.) Normally she was confident, the leader in times of trouble, but he snatched it like a rug from beneath her feet and degraded her with his humor. And she hardly had support, for she had spoken with Mikalya, who was in a terrible mood because Haji was smitten with Adair. The girl was too wrapped up in her own problems to pay Ahsoka any mind, and considering Haji's unnaturally dreamy state, though she now spent her time bickering with Mikalya, snapping at Ahsoka, and flushing when near Adair, Ahsoka didn't think she could bear a conversation with the older girl.

Finally, she replied, though stiffly, "I am not like her. You watch and I'll put this right through my console."

"No, you won't." He disagreed, "We'd crash. You of all people know better than that. Should, at least." Adair didn't speak for a moment, then he said, "Your shields aren't up. You don't like being bested...even though I'm not besting you. Not really. Though you've got to work on that, ya know, because of the whole Vader thing. You can do that, right?"

Ahsoka pulled her shields up quickly and maintained a rather reasonable look on her face, and grumbled, "Shields are a Youngling's play."

"Then it should've been easy for you." Adair reasoned. Confident, confident, confident. But at least this comment was not so infuriating as before, and Ahsoka sighed as she watched him play with his lightning ball again, though it no longer made her nervous, rather, curious. She waited until he said, "Going to bed," And then began snapping her fingers quietly, trying to conjure the stupid thing of energy, and failing quite miserably.

Eventually, Haji came in to cease Ahsoka's attempts and frustrations; she said she'd stay here, why hadn't Ahsoka slept? Ahsoka complied, despite her want to continue trying.

Morning meant a breakfast of eggs, and a sample of fruits - most of which unappetizing to a Togruta, but Mikalya seemed pleased over a particular one, and Haji seemed a bit upset. "Not like you normally eat gourmet." Mikalya said, mouth full.

Meme, elusive Meme, was watching the girls eat, but not touching the food at all. When curiosity provoked Mikalya's why, the old blind woman replied, "The Force generally sustenance."

By this point, Ahsoka's company was driving her insane, though she had taken a liking to Mikalya - Adair just flat out irritated her, Haji could be alright (though she was a snob), and though Ahsoka's initial thought to Meme were that she liked her, the woman seemed so intense, so drastic...and now the girl had to eat breakfast with the whole crowd of them. Not that it lasted long - Meme was dragging her away, and said to Adair sharply, "Clean up after finish. You slob."

"Aw, Meme." He said, "Get one of 'em cleaning droids." Meme glared - funny how she couldn't see, but the glare was so fixated on him it was if she could - at him carefully, and he consented, "I was kidding, Meme. Have fun - what was it? Snips?"

Ahsoka bristled under Meme's touch and spat, "_Ahsoka_."

"Kay, Jedi Girl." Adair responded, then winked, "Ahsoka, I mean." Meme look was clouded, but lingered in Adair's direction, but the energy beneath was so powerful and severe everybody in the room could feel it. All went silent, especially Adair, but he remained untroubled to the intensity he was held in. And he agreed respectfully, "I apologize, Meme. You, too, Ahsoka." When Ahsoka looked into his eyes, she saw a far more humbled boy then the one who had teased her so unforgivingly.

She stared after him, wondered what exactly made him so obedient to Meme, whereas he seemed the boy otherwise who did what he liked, when he liked, where he liked. Meme clucked after her, and said, "Come, Ah-so-ka." She said it like she was trying a new word, so foreign in her mouth that it tasted weird, then smiled kindly, "Proposition." Ahsoka followed her, wary at the least, but soon Meme halted.

"You were Jedi." She began, her lips hardly moving, her words soft, "I know." It was the first grammatically correct sentence from her lips, but Ahsoka paid no mind. She was tense, and waiting, wondering. "Once." Meme said, "You train no more? Your master dying."

"He's dead." Ahsoka said plainly, her red-orange fingers clenched, but not so much in sorrow.

The Force engulfed her, and it was almost comforting, but Ahsoka pressed her shields up further, and tried to repeat that Anakin was dead, that her Skyguy was nonexistent. But Meme said, "Hush. Your master dying. He lives inside monster. Dying. Suffocating."

"Doesn't mean I'm being trained." Ahsoka replied bluntly - something about the blind woman demanded respect she could see now, and didn't want to overlap her too much - but she was sick of this. Meme was almost scary, with the intensity the radiated from, no matter the sweet kindness within. And was it so stupid that the Togruta stood there and defied it? Perhaps - but much like a child, she pressed to see how far she could go.

"I train you. Adair," She sighed, "also train. On own terms, if wish."

It was too much to ask for, to even hope for...Meme was not Anakin, and was not Jenx...she was not the Jedi Order, and Adair wasn't even like a Padawan. But it was beyond anything Ahsoka dreamed of, at least at this point, and she could only gap. "When? Where?"

"Where you think Vader not find us?" Meme replied, "We go to your home planet."

"Oh, of course - Meme, do you think - um - well, there's this girl I saved from the Temple when Vader destroyed it. And, do you think."

"I no train her." Meme responded sharply, "You save, you admit responsibility, you train. And you learn. Also. Haji and Mika join lesson. Be civil - civilized."

Ahsoka was not the kind of girl to say in a very fast, very excited girly fashion, 'thankyouthankyouthankyou!'. And she didn't, even though she would if she could get over her shock. Instead, she smiled wildly, and she still was when Adair stepped it, "Coming to Shilli. Jedi Girl, where do you want to land."

"I can do it."

He looked at her up and down carefully, and leaned on the door frame teasingly, "I dunno. Crash-land, perhaps?" She scowled fiercely, and he just sort of grinned. "I think you're too happy to actually look mad. Of course, it could be -"

"Shut up, Adair."

"Yes, Meme."

**Alright, I think I forgot an AN last time - well, a small one. But a shout out to sachariah who gave me an idea for Meme's species (Miraluka - which you did spell correctly), even if I modified it a bit, because I researched it and they can't see, but can see through the Force, like Meme. They're incredible warriors, apparently, and don't have eyes. And Meme did. So she's half-human, with eyes, but without sight. I hope it works. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Three Years Later**

In the years that followed after Meme's proposition, the three older girls, Cala, Adair, and a young boy Cala had come to grudgingly like all trained under Meme. For a time. But then, Meme had stopped initiating training quite so readily, and stopped all together...and slowly, her life came to pass.

Ahsoka and Adair had continued to bicker, but Ahsoka was slowly becoming happier. She missed the Clone Wars - her life didn't seem complete without the Jedi - but she was pleased.

However, Ahsoka had no idea how hard Meme's death would come to the other boy. The twenty-one year old had never particularly matured, but when Meme finally died, he had seemed shaken significantly. Ahsoka had hardly known what to say to him at first, but finally he had confronted her, yelling at her, "Don't you even care!" He had shouted. The Togruta winced in surprise to that, and tried to explain.

Cala, now almost ten, was growing quickly. She actually had a collection of friends, probably won over by her bravado and lies, something that Mai was forever scolding her about.

Mai, of course, was glad that her daughter had remained home, though much her motherly instinct, she called it, was initiated on Cala. She seemed almost afraid to treat Ahsoka like a daughter at all, probably because the Togruta was at the age of twenty and mostly grown up.

Mikalya was fifteen, and Haji was twenty one.

Haji still harbored a liking for Adair, much to the disgust of particularly Mikalya, but she no longer oogled over him the way she had. She was a know-it-all, but incredibly good at analyzing situations and had knowledge of each and everything thing they trained for because of her research.

Ra'shaal was a young non-Force-sensitive child who had discovered their secret. He bugged Cala incessantly, she complained, but they were of the same age and ended playing together anyway. He and Adair often complained of the dominance of girls over their life, and tried to gang up on them. Cala would always threateningly wave a fist at him, but that never shushed him.

It was two months after Meme's death now, Ahsoka mulled, standing by a river. They were secluded for the most part from the Togrutan village, though Ahsoka, Cala , Adair, and Ra'shaal often went there. Cala and Ra'shaal had come to have many friends, and without Ahoska's knowledge, or Mai's, liked to bet and race in the speeder races. Cala was quite pleased that she had won two. Adair had his own collection of friends, whom he probably had Force-seduced to even get them to like him, Ahsoka thought. Even Ahsoka had her own friends, but she wasn't particularly close to them. She lived in her own 'tribe', the tribe of Mai, Meme, Cala, Ra'shaal, Adair, Mikalya, and Haji. And a young boy that was the son of Tali, Mai's closest friend. The four-year-old Zared had been taken on by Adair who had developed an uncharacteristic softness for the child. Even though Ahsoka initially wanted to tease him, she understood Force-bonds, and never said a word.

Yet, there was still that looming sorrow over Meme's death - the whole of the 'tribe' had been effected by the blow, and Adair was moping. Yes, he had yelled at Ahsoka, but she had merely stuttered, "I don't think you understand." And they had hardly seen each other in the past few weeks.

There was an angry muttering behind her, Ahsoka could hear it from a mile away due to her Togrutan abilities - despite an accident that had happened in the Clone Wars, she was pleased that she had retained most of hearing. Ahsoka also knew that the voice was Cala's.

The girl was more slender than she had been those fours years ago, and her vibrant eyes were sharp - Ahsoka always found herself mesmerized by those orbs. They glowed, sparked, showing her emotions like on a neon board.

"What's up?" Ahsoka asked mildly, cocking an eye-marking curiously.

"Nothing." The girl said, then blurted, "Ra'shaal is a pain." Sullen, the girl stared at the river. She looked so moody that Ahsoka nearly pushed her in, but instead said, "Well, he likes you."

Cala scoffed lightly, and muttered, "Yeah. Right. At least he doesn't run to mommy anymore when I hit him."

"You haven't hit him in two years." Ahsoka reminded her. "And last time you did, you caught it big time from Mom and I, didn't you?" Ahsoka's voice was dry as sandpaper.

"Adair thought it was funny." Cala protested in mild annoyance. She brushed off her dark purple leggings, and her gray sash - she dislike the skirts that most of the Togrutan women wore - and sighed. "He deserved it." She said decisively.

Ahsoka nodded thoughtfully, "He should of hit you back, you little brat." She nudged Cala to show that she was only teasing, and Cala frowned even harder at her, her markings furrowed deeply.

"You're not helping." The girl whined, looking none too pleased with the older Togrutan girl, but Ahsoka merely shrugged. Her arms brushed her lekku, and they twitched. Ahsoka was having an incredibly hard time with her still-growing lekku. They went down to mid-stomach now, and every time she moved, they moved.

Ahsoka looked at the younger girl, and then slowly wrapped the Force around her - and shoved her into the river. The girl emerged spluttering and coughing, with Ahsoka slowly dissolving into giggles. "Ahsoka!" The small Togruta yelled, splashing her. Of course, soon they were involved in an all-out war, one that included Force-enhanced sprays, tree climbing...until darkness loomed, and the two girls headed back.

Their dwelling had been renovated to house the eight occupants that might be in it at one time, though most that lived there had to share a room. Only Ra'shaal and Xared weren't in the house at all times, for Ra'shaal lived with his overbearing mother, and Xared was Tali's child.

Ahsoka herself shared a room with Cala, which only seemed right because as the years passed Cala and Ahsoka's relationship remained close, but often changed - Ahsoka might be a sister, a mother, or a mentor - but perhaps mostly an older sister.

The two Togrutas slid into the house that was hard to see because of a door veiled by vines, and the home sculpted into a cave. Most of the other occupants were there, including Ra'shaal, but not Xared - Ahsoka could feel each Force signature. Mai came in looking disapproving. "You missed dinner." Her gaze was directed at Cala. The younger child muttered something about Ra'shaal, and then hurried to get changed.

Ahsoka watched her go ruefully, and then gave a half-hearted smile to her mother. "I'm sorry about that."

Mai sighed softly in quiet response, but said nothing. Ahsoka, however, got the meaning - Mai worried that Ahsoka and Cala might be found and not returned. Ahsoka tried not to dwell on it, but she and Cala were severely endangering the rest.

Ahsoka hesitated, unknowing of what to say, and she turned to get go to her shared room with Cala. True to all Jedi, Cala was quickly and neatly dressed in her normal attire, without much care for looks. Though her training had slowed in the past few months, Cala had managed to retain some of the Jedi attitude, though not all.

Cala went to eat alone - the child typically could eat an entire akul for each individual meal, but Ahsoka's meals were often small. A Jedi didn't actually need much, and Ahsoka still lived as such.

The night passed as become the norm. Ahsoka went over more advanced lightsaber techniques, whilst reviewing Cala's, critiquing carefully, and then did some Force work.

Later, after Cala had fallen asleep, Ahsoka wandered into the room that they all shared when together for training. It had bars to jump from, obstacles, mats, guns that shot lasers that only burned lightly - done by Adair's careful handiwork. He never said how he got that parts, and occasionally Ahsoka wondered if he had stolen them.

Her fingers wrapped around one of them and she threw her body upwards, grasping the next as she flew into the air. Quickly, she scaled the walls, then grasped a rope that hung from the ceiling and slide down halfway before swinging herself across the room. Her finger punched a button to activate the lasers, and the young Togrutan woman flipped to the ground, activating a green 'saber in regular shien style.

The Jedi did this for awhile, letting the sweat form on her face, letting herself fall into the Force naturally. This made her days all the more bearable - had she been alone, Ahsoka swore she would've died.

"Don't think so loudly," A voice jolted the Togruta out of reverie. The girl snapped off her lightsabers, managing to get a sting from the laser. She loudly cursed the laser and the owner of the voice - who was Adair, of course, and then deactivated the lasers with the Force.

"Thanks a lot." She grumbled, stalking over to the door and dropping her 'sabers. She glanced at him suspiciously; they had hardly talked and she felt a little awkward. Besides, she still hated to acknowledge that he was 'better' than her.

Adair leaned on the door frame, and remarked, "Don't let the littlest thing distract you. And, Jedi Girl, it's not a competition. If you ever get over being better than me, you'll be a very good warrior. Instead, it's always about comparing skill points."

Ahsoka flushed, and hissed, "It's not that big of a deal to me. It's just how did somebody so immature end up so -" She did not want to say good. She would not. Instead, she merely glared at him. Adair hardly noticed her scathing comments, and just grinned sadly at her unspoken word.

Ahsoka's annoyance started to drop, but still, her shields barricaded him from her mind. Adair evidently noted this, but he nonetheless still said, "We have to talk."

"About?" The Togruta shifted positions warily.

"What we're going to do with the others. How we're going to train." Adair replied point-blankly. "Meme's gone. She can't be our mentor anymore at all. We have to move on, and -"

"You don't know how." Ahsoka wasn't finishing his sentence, wasn't asking a question - she just knew. She knew that Adair didn't know what to do know that the person who had raised him had passed. Ahsoka's blue eyes met his almost defiantly, daring him to disagree.

Adair's shoulders dropped a notch reluctantly, and he murmured, "I guess not."

Ahsoka grabbed a towel, wiping the sweat from her face, her mind swirling as she tried to think of something, anything, a way to help them.

Only a single image planted itself in her mind, and she tried to push it away - because it led to an avalanche of other things. Eventually, the young Togruta sighed.

"I guess I can't stay here forever - I know somebody who might be able to help train us." The girl looked up, "Or maybe training's just become something to do...but for what? What are we going to do? Survive? We train for nothing at all."

Adair didn't reply, and Ahsoka found that the more horrible than the fact that she did believe her words - because if Adair did - then who else?

Silence. Ahsoka looked at him, daring, hoping he'd reply, but finally, he said, "I don't know." He looked at the walls, and muttered, "We're safe here."

Ahsoka didn't reply. She wanted to leave - this was her home, but Ahsoka was not one to stay and sit and listen. She was hiding, only hiding, because she'd certainly be killed should she leave.

Her thoughts drifted to Obi-Wan, to Yoda, and she wished she hadn't let her mind go there. They would stay in exile, but should she not...should she take off and try to create trouble...then she could possibly kill everybody.

"I need to think about it." The Togruta finally said as she brushed past him, heading towards her room. She knew that she wouldn't sleep tonight, though.

The man who had once saved her, was once a Jedi, kept drifting into her mind. Jenx. She didn't dare open a Force-connection with him, because of Vader - certainly Vader would feel her thoughts.

Ahsoka sat on her lumpy mattress and stared across the room at her sleeping comrade. She had vowed to keep the little Youngling safe from harm, and yet...why was it so confusing? Why did it feel so wrong to leave, and wrong to stay?

**Of course, something's going to happen *hint* now. Of course. Maybe not immediately. So. I actually don't know much about between episodes 3-4, mainly I know the Prequels. So this is probably-definitely AU. And I posted a debut for a story I've called Ascending into the Light. It's also an AU of ROTS, like Descending, but ends up a lot darker but without Anakin falling to the Dark Side. 'Soka's in it. Maybe a few of the OCs here will be in it, too. **

**I'm SORRY FOR THE REALLY LONG WAIT! I REALLY AM! I PROMISE TO POST MORE NOW THAT I DON'T HAVE WRITER'S BLOCK! **

~**HorseStar**


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